I won't let you fall apart

[prodigal_slayer]

It didn't take Wes long at all to fall off to sleep. Not that I was exactly surprised, these nurses had a whole bunch of drugs pumped into him. I was more surprised that he still remembered his own name, let alone ours. I should ask 'em to dope up Angel too. That way I wouldn't be sittin' next to Wes and eyeing Angel like a hawk. He kept doin' that

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[__angel]

She was worried about me. Well, I was going to be okay. Now that I know that Wes is alive, I'm okay now. And yeah, Faith is here, but I knew she'd be okay. I heard Wes muttering in his sleep and I looked over at him before slowly walking over to Faith, sitting in the chair next to her.

"I'm not going anywhere," I whispered and crossed my leg over the other before leaning back in my chair. There was no way I could have done what I was going to do now, not when he's still alive. I just didn't know what we were going to do. The building is gone, they'd probably come after us, I wasn't sure. Maybe we should go to Rome, I could have a talk with the Wolfram and Hart over there. Or maybe I should just let it all go. I was confused for the time being, but right now, making sure Wesley was alright was the only thing that needed to be done.

"I think ... I need to check on something else." Lorne. He was with Lindsey. I wanted to make sure that Lorne got the job done, then I wanted to go and find my son. There were things I needed to do, that I was going to forget all about. I have to say that Faith came just in time.

[angels_bitch]

"What?" I asked, shaking my head confused as he sat down on the hard plastic chair beside me. He was a small cold comfort beside me as we both watched Wesley. Funny, me watchin' the watcher and all. Fate had a wicked sense of irony sometimes.

But what was that? He said he wasn't leavin', wasn't goin anywhere and then in the same breath said he needed to go and check on something. Well, not technically a breath since ya know, vampire. But still! How the hell was I supposed to keep up with that? Lookin' down at Wes again, he looked pretty unconscious. Probably be out like a light for hours as doped up as he was.

"What do you have to check up on? Because I'm comin' with you so don't even argue with me." I said, clenching my jaw. No way was I lettin' him walk out of this room alone.

[__angel]

I knew one of us had to stay with him just in case he woke up. Even though he was medicine, I wasn't sure, he could wake up at anytime and I'd rather have someone here with him so he knows he wouldn't be alone. It could wait, we could all go together, but then again, time was running out and I needed to know that Lorne was safe and Lindsey was gone.

"Sent Lorne out, he had a job, I just need to know that he made it," I said as I stared at Wes. Some part of me was thinking that he was okay, that he got out, but still, there was always that chance and I needed to be sure.

"And not to start an argument," I said and glanced at her, "But if I go now, then you're staying here."

[prodigal_slayer]

Not to start an argument? Didn't I just tell him that there was definitely gonna be an argument if he just thought he could walk outta here and leave me and Wes here without him. No way. I wasn't fallin' for that shit, and I didn't care what he said.

"Look, Wes ain't goin' anywhere. He's in the hospital where he should be, and fuck man. Look at all the drugs they got pumped into him. He's gonna be conked out til next week at this rate. If you wanna talk to Lorne can't you just call him? It won't take that long. I'll grab a smoke and you can call Lorne. And yes I'm comin' with you. Get over it."

Taking a deep breath, I looked up at Angel with a serious expression on my face. Wasn't usually one for that many words that weren't packed with serious attitude, but some things just needed to be said. And usually? Angel was the only person I could really say them to.

[__angel]

"Fine," I said and stood up. She would go have a smoke, I'd call Lorne and then we'd come back in and sit with Wes for however long. That sounded fine with me. Actually, I didn't want to argue with her anymore tonight. That's all we've been doing anyway, but I'm glad we did cause then I wouldn't have known that Wes was alive.

She stood up as well and I gave Wes another look over before I walked out, heading outside. Might as well stay together just in case anything happens. But what would happen? I wouldn't think alot, not right now anyway.

Pulling out my phone, I looked through the phonebook on my phone, looking for his number. I never know how to use these things. Finally finding it, I press the green button and wait for him to pick up.

He finally did, telling me that the job was done and that he was okay. I was fine with that. He also told me that he was never coming back and for that, I couldn't blame him. I could tell he was angry at me for me having him do what he did, but it had to be done. I told him about Wesley and he said that he may come and see him before he actually does leave, then we hung up.

Glancing over at Faith, I see her standing on the curb, smoking her cigarette. I come to stand beside her and put my phone away. "I called, everything is ... okay."

[prodigal_slayer]

I could hear Angel on the phone even as I stepped outside. The grass was slick and dewy under my boots as I walked to the curb. Hard to believe it was still a couple hours til sunrise. All of this shit had happened in one night. One night, and everything went to hell for him. My eyes stayed on him, and for a second I was struck at how jealous I sorta was.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't want Soul Boy to go off and do something wicked dumb like staking himself. But he wanted to do it while I was still around. He changed his mind when he realized Wesley was still around. An irrational jealous streak went through me as I took another puff off of my cigarette. Whatever. Boys will be boys.

I kept watching him even as he put the phone back in his pocket and walked over to me. Grimly he told me that everything was okay. Well gee, that was a relief because everything really wasn't okay at all. I still had no fucking clue what I'd just walked in on.

"Angel..." I finally said after a minute. "What happened tonight? Please tell me."

[__angel]

Looking around for a moment to make sure no one was really around, I took a deep non existing breath and placed my hands on my hips, looking out onto the street. She wanted to know what happened tonight and I had to relive everything all over again, not like I wasn't already, but I was going to go into detail, or try to.

Thinking about it for a second, I finally just opened my mouth about everything. About how we got to Wolfram and Hart, what I had to do. The visions I had and I wondered for a second if I still had them. Told her about Cordy and everything leading up to tonight.

After I told her everything in a blank tone, I glanced over at her as she lit another cigarette. Holding my hand out, she gave me one and I lit it up, exhaling into the night air. More like morning. I can smell the sun that was about to come over in a few hours. If we were going to leave, we'd have to do it now, or else I'd have to use the tunnels.

[prodigal_slayer]

I stood there, stoicly smoking my cigarette and watching him as he told me all the crazy shit that went down. Wolfram and Hart, that Illyria chick, Spike and Wes. The senior partners put the smack down and Angel knew it was gonna happen. He'd told them all that they were gonna die and they signed up for it. I knew why he was disappointed now. He thought he'd be the captain goin' down with the ship. Instead the ship was just destroyed and now he was smoking. What was up with that?

"Angel, it's not your fault. You got the vision, you saw your path. All the rest of 'em? They knew what they were signing up for. Wes knew what he was signing up for. They were fighting for their cause and it's not your fault. They knew!" I knew it didn't matter how many times I told him, he'd still think it was his fault.

There was nothing I could do to convince him that this wasn't his fault. He was so damn thick headed sometimes. Did he really think I'd be standing outside some shady hospital wearin' sweatpants and a hotel t-shirt if he wasn't needed? If I wasn't completely sure that he coudln't do anything stupid.

[__angel]

Flicking the cigarette away, I blew out the rest of the smoke and sighed, rolling on the balls of my feet. I guess she was right. They did know what they were signing up for, they knew what could happen, but I should have went down with them. I should have been the one, not them and now look at me. I'm standing here talking to Faith and ... Wes is inside, recovering from surgery. I hate to say this, but I'm glad Wes made it. No, I don't hate to say that. I am glad, I just wish the others did as well.

"I should have called you guys, or not ... I'm not sure," I said with a shrug, then glanced at her. "You know Spike and I went to Rome? We uh, saw Buffy and her ... well, that idiot Immortal." I hated him. "I hope she knows what she's getting herself into."

He wasn't that dangerous, he was just an ass and well, a demon. But Buffy was her own person and well, that ship sailed. A long time ago.

[prodigal_slayer]

I was tempted to reach out and smack him upside the head with the next words that came out of his mouth. He was in Rome with Spike and hadn't even bothered to stop and see me? Gee, guessed it didn't matter as long as he got to see his favorite slayer. Asshole. Leave it to him and Spike to get their panties all in a twist about B and her new boytoy.

"No, how would I know that you were in Rome when you never bothered to pop in and say hey?" I asked, raising an eyebrow in his direction as I took one last drag off of my smoke and flicked the butt away.

"And yeah, you shoulda called. Mighta saved me from havin' to stop you from stakin' yourself." A twinge of irritation gave way in my voice as I looked up at him. Then again, if he had called and I'd made my way down here sooner who knew? I might be dead right now. I mean, Spike didn't survive. Either did that weird super strong blue chick.

[__angel]

I think the small talk that I brought up, didn't work cause I could tell she was mad at me. Great, this wasn't what I needed. Blinking a few times looking at her, I nodded my head, then looked out onto the street, wondering how I was going to get myself out of that one.

"Actually, we didn't go there ... looking for Buffy." Not really. Okay, we did, a little, but just to warn her and we had to get something. We finally did get it, but we didn't even talk to Buffy. It was a lost cause ... she moved on. From both of us.

"So yeah ..." Turning around, I shoved my hands in my pockets and made my way to the bench that was by the concrete wall, sitting myself down.

"Figure we could get a hotel, unless you were going back to Rome," I said nonchalantly with a shrug.

[prodigal_slayer]

I sighed as I watched him sink down on the bench. I'd never seen him look so defeated and honestly it kinda scared me a little bit. Because when all was said and done I still looked to him to be the one with the answers. Still expected him to play the part of the hero. Maybe that was unfair of me?

"Yeah," I said sarcastically as I plopped down on the bench beside him. "Rome's so excitin' I just can't wait to get back. Only ya know, not." I shot him a half smile as he looked down at me.

"I'm here. Wouldn't be here if I didn't wanna be and you can't get rid of me. 'Sides you can pretend that you're doin' me a favor since I don't really got any desire to have Giles draggin' me around to more boring museums."

[__angel]

"Museums aren't boring," I threw in and gave her a small smile. Well, they weren't. You just had to ... nevermind. So she was going to stay, she wanted to stay and not go back to Rome. That could work. It would work. We could do this.

Reminded me when we first started out. Doyle, Cordelia and me. Agency and what not. Only now they're both dead and I'm still here. It didn't make sense. I should have been ... a long time ago. Not sitting here watching my friends die.

"Maybe we should go inside, do you think? I just don't want Wes to wake up and be alone, we'll talk about what we're going to do in there. I know we need to find a place to go, get some clothes, stuff like that. I'm not sure."

[prodigal_slayer]

Nodding at him, I stood up and followed him back into the hospital and into Wesley's room. Wes was still down for the count looked like. Not that I was surprised. We hadn't been gone all that long and they were still pumpin' drugs into him like there was no tomorrow.

Once we were inside I plopped back down into the chair. Suddenly I felt a little better. Angel didn't seem to be about to run off and do something stupid. Maybe once Wes was better he'd stop bein' all broody too. Wondered what was goin' on there....

"What about the Hyperion? That all gone now?" I asked curiously.

[__angel]

"No, I guess it's not," I muttered and looked over at Wes as I sat back down in the chair. We could go there, do what we need to do, fix it up again. I'm sure no one is staying there and it is mine. Now we have a place to go.

I wondered how long Wes would be out like this. This whole set up reminded me of when I came in and tried to kill him. It's like it's happening right in front of me and I have to close my eyes making it go away.

I looked over at Faith just sitting there, watching Wes and I smiled a little, then rested my elbows on my knee's and brought my hands together, leaning down a bit. My body ached and I knew if I wanted to, I could sleep for days.

"Thanks for being here."