[fic] The Reasons (Trinity Blood, Ion Fortuna, Alpha #17)
Title: The Reasons
Author: moony810
Theme: Alpha # 17, new world
Pairing: hinted IonxRadu and IonxEsther, IonxAbel
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I owned Trinity Blood, I wouldn't have to write fanfiction about it.
Summary: Their reasons for the journey aren't as altruistic as they seem on the surface.
The Reasons
His reasons for going on this journey with Abel probably seemed altruistic on the surface. A nobleman of the Empire, willing to lay down life and limb for his Great Mother and his homeland without a second thought or a regret. He wished at times that that was really all there was to it, that he really was that noble, self-sacrificing person. But all he really was one small, selfish person in the grand scheme of things.
He wasn't on this journey for the Empress or the Empire or the world. It was for himself and the two people he loved most in the world, the only way he could think of to protect the one still living and avenge the one who'd died and make both of their wishes come true. They both wanted a new world, and killing Contra Mundi was the only way to achieve that.
Esther wanted a world where Methuselah and humans could live together in harmony, despite their differences. She was working hard for that in Albion, had been since she was crowned queen, and Contra Mundi's goal was for the opposite to happen- he wished to spark a massive war that would decimate both sides. Ion would do all he could to ensure that the two races could at least achieve some sort of peace in Esther's lifetime, even if it meant he got blood on his hands, even if it meant he died. Not only because it was Esther's wish, but because if there was peace between their races, it would no longer be taboo for him to love her. There, that selfishness again.
Radu, too, had wanted a new world. He had felt oppressed by the class system in the Empire and had wanted to create a world without such restrictions, where he would have as much chance at Augusta listening to him as Ion had, or his grandmother or the Duchess of Kiev had. So Ion took up this journey for him as well, to avenge his death. Radu had only been fighting for what he believed in, and had died for it. The Orden had used him in life and kept on using him in death when he should have had peace, the Puppetmaster especially. So Ion would tear them all limb from limb as a memorial for Radu. He had a feeling that Radu, if his spirit were watching over Ion, would enjoy that.
So, he was on this journey for his own selfish, deeply personal reasons, rather than any desire to save the world. And he had a feeling the same was true of Abel. They'd never talked about it, of course, and they probably never would. They'd both been too fucked over on too personal a level by someone they cared about to show anyone enough trust to bare their souls like that. They were both damaged and distrusting and that was why they could journey together, why they could even love each other until the journey came to an end and they had to part ways. Each carried their own personal hell, and having each other made it more bearable.
But the day came when he could no longer respect the silence between them when it came to their reasons. They were, Abel said, very close to the base of operations of the Rozenkreuz Orden, and the likelihood was high that they would die in battle. And he needed to know.
“Abel, tell me something. And be honest.” He propped himself on Abel's bare chest, staring down at him.
“What do you want to know?” Abel asked, tracing his fingertips down Ion's back. He met Ion's serious look with an equally serious look of his own. He seemed to sense, just like Ion, that the time for them to keep secrets was past.
“Why do you fight? Why are you on this journey?” Ion asked.
“Why did you come with me?” Abel returned.
“Because I want to avenge Radu and eliminate the people standing in the way of the peace Esther wants.”
Abel smiled at him. “And I want to avenge Lilith and eliminate the people standing in the way of the peace Caterina wants.”
“You don't want to save the world, then.”
“No. I just want to avenge and protect the people I love most.”
“I'm glad. That means I'm not the only one.”
“No. We're both selfish.” Abel rested his forehead against Ion's.
Ion sighed in response, nuzzling closer. “And since we're both selfish...” He kissed Abel firmly.
When they drew apart for air, Abel laughed.
“You're ready for another round already?”
“This might be the last night we have.” Ion reminded him. “We should make it good.” They kissed again, and Abel flipped them, pinning Ion underneath him. When the kiss ended, Ion put his hands on Abel's shoulder. “Abel?”
“Yes?” Abel trailed kisses down to Ion's chest.
“What happens if we don't die tomorrow?”
Abel paused. Hidden in Ion's question were at least a dozen others, not the least of which being, 'Will we honestly be able to quit each other and go back to how we used to be?' “I don't know.” He admitted, then planted a kiss in the center of Ion's chest. “We'll just have to cross that bridge when we come to it, I suppose.” He gripped Ion's hips and slid in, shooting Ion a mischievous look. “Are you sure you won't be limping tomorrow?”
Ion snorted, thrusting his hips back against Abel's. “Of course I'm sure. I'll have healed by tomorrow, no matter how rough you are.” He drew Abel down for another kiss, and there were no more words between them after that for a long while.