Response to challenge #128, The please forgive me challenge
Title: How could you do this to me?
Rating: R, for macabre themes and generally squicky ideas.
Characters: Peter Pettigrew
Author's notes: I've been sitting on this for about a week, deciding whether to post it. I want to make it clear that I don't approve of Peter's ideas on relationships or his methods of getting what he wants. It's hard to do that in a fic from the point of view of the character who's so out of line. So yeah, that's the caveat.
I never meant it to happen. You must believe that. I thought you’d be okay. You don’t understand, Lily; I made a bargain for your life! James and Harry were always going to die, but the Dark Lord promised me you’d be spared! Why didn’t you stand aside when he came?
I was never like the others. James was brilliant, Sirius was handsome, even Remus was mysterious and interesting. I was just the stupid kid they suffered to tag along with them. They didn’t really like me. They didn’t see how I struggled with every little spell and potion. Only you took the time to sit with me in the library, or to help me in Sluggy’s class. They were too busy having fun and charming girls. There was only ever one girl I wanted; and James, James who already had everything, he got you. It was so unfair!
You should have been mine, Lily. You would have been mine, if you’d just obeyed the Dark Lord. He promised me that you would have been my reward. I would have been his closest ally once he’d defeated James and Harry, greater than you could have ever imagined; and you could have been there by my side! He promised me that you wouldn’t remember James or what I had done. I would have made you so happy.
Now, I live every day with the knowledge that I caused your death. How could you do that to me? How could you leave me alone with people who despise me? Didn’t you understand I needed you?
We’ll be together again, though. I promise. I’m watching for my chance to do the Dark Lord another great service, and when I do, he’ll make an inferius of you for me.
And at last you’ll be mine.
Rating: R, for macabre themes and generally squicky ideas.
Characters: Peter Pettigrew
Author's notes: I've been sitting on this for about a week, deciding whether to post it. I want to make it clear that I don't approve of Peter's ideas on relationships or his methods of getting what he wants. It's hard to do that in a fic from the point of view of the character who's so out of line. So yeah, that's the caveat.
I never meant it to happen. You must believe that. I thought you’d be okay. You don’t understand, Lily; I made a bargain for your life! James and Harry were always going to die, but the Dark Lord promised me you’d be spared! Why didn’t you stand aside when he came?
I was never like the others. James was brilliant, Sirius was handsome, even Remus was mysterious and interesting. I was just the stupid kid they suffered to tag along with them. They didn’t really like me. They didn’t see how I struggled with every little spell and potion. Only you took the time to sit with me in the library, or to help me in Sluggy’s class. They were too busy having fun and charming girls. There was only ever one girl I wanted; and James, James who already had everything, he got you. It was so unfair!
You should have been mine, Lily. You would have been mine, if you’d just obeyed the Dark Lord. He promised me that you would have been my reward. I would have been his closest ally once he’d defeated James and Harry, greater than you could have ever imagined; and you could have been there by my side! He promised me that you wouldn’t remember James or what I had done. I would have made you so happy.
Now, I live every day with the knowledge that I caused your death. How could you do that to me? How could you leave me alone with people who despise me? Didn’t you understand I needed you?
We’ll be together again, though. I promise. I’m watching for my chance to do the Dark Lord another great service, and when I do, he’ll make an inferius of you for me.
And at last you’ll be mine.