trapped
i wrote this about a week ago. its on my other diaries. now its on here.
this is a poem to try to describe what it was that ive felt
in the past. i dont know if it worked. oh well...
suffocating
im trapped and i
have no way out.
you all know what
im talking about.
it all began
optimistically,
we used to think
we were meant to be.
and then things happened
that no one could see.
and these things have
you questioning me.
i didnt feel them
when it began.
i only felt truth
and a trusting hand.
but something changed
that left me apart.
it clouded my mind
and distorted my heart.
no i cant breath
when im with you.
and i dont know
what else to do.
i scream when no one
else is around,
but no one ever
hears that sound.
it always happens and
here is my flaw.
i act like nothings
wrong at all
just hoping to get
the feelings back,
the love and happiness
that we lack.
i try to hide it,
to the point that i break
and i know i cannot
go on being fake.
its a vicious cycle.
it isnt fair
to be with somebody
who isnt there.
i know this
and i hate it when
i make-believe
until the end.
it has to end,
it cant go on.
theres too much pressure
im too far gone.
i have to do this
and i hope you see,
i dont want to hurt you
but its killing me.
im being someone
that isnt me.
im sorry that
we cannot be.
i tried to put words to my illness. i dont know if it came
out well. i dont know, maybe someone else will understand
where im coming from. maybe not. im sorry for being like
this, but im not the only one. maybe im just not ready. i
guess well find out. until later, im gonna split. peaces,
-2t_e
final thought: am i sleeping or waking, destroying or
making, am i really faking?
this is a poem to try to describe what it was that ive felt
in the past. i dont know if it worked. oh well...
suffocating
im trapped and i
have no way out.
you all know what
im talking about.
it all began
optimistically,
we used to think
we were meant to be.
and then things happened
that no one could see.
and these things have
you questioning me.
i didnt feel them
when it began.
i only felt truth
and a trusting hand.
but something changed
that left me apart.
it clouded my mind
and distorted my heart.
no i cant breath
when im with you.
and i dont know
what else to do.
i scream when no one
else is around,
but no one ever
hears that sound.
it always happens and
here is my flaw.
i act like nothings
wrong at all
just hoping to get
the feelings back,
the love and happiness
that we lack.
i try to hide it,
to the point that i break
and i know i cannot
go on being fake.
its a vicious cycle.
it isnt fair
to be with somebody
who isnt there.
i know this
and i hate it when
i make-believe
until the end.
it has to end,
it cant go on.
theres too much pressure
im too far gone.
i have to do this
and i hope you see,
i dont want to hurt you
but its killing me.
im being someone
that isnt me.
im sorry that
we cannot be.
i tried to put words to my illness. i dont know if it came
out well. i dont know, maybe someone else will understand
where im coming from. maybe not. im sorry for being like
this, but im not the only one. maybe im just not ready. i
guess well find out. until later, im gonna split. peaces,
-2t_e
final thought: am i sleeping or waking, destroying or
making, am i really faking?