Limited Edition Barbies, for all my East Coast VA friends :-)
GHENT BARBIE
This princess Barbie is only sold at the MacArthur Centre. She comes with
Kenneth Cole 4-inch clunky shoes, an assortment of Kate spade handbags and a
Mercedes-Benz stretch limo. Options include: tummy tuck, face-lift and a
work-a-alcoholic Ken.
PORTSMOUTH BARBIE
This recently paroled Barbie come with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, and
a metallic orange low-rider '88 Pontiac with oversized wheels and tinted
windows. Julia, her DSS caseworker has curved arms that actually hold her
two babies as she takes them away.
VA BEACH NORTH END BARBIE
This yuppie Barbie comes with choice of a BMW sports car or a souped up
Hummer H2, also available is her 4,500 sq. ft. starter home built to
resemble Tara.
GREAT BRIDGE BARBIE
This trendy homemaker Barbie is available with the Lexus SUV or Ford
Windstar minivan, gets lost easily, and has no full time occupation or
secondary education. Comes with lots of oversized jewelry, all of it
genuine. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
OCEAN VIEW BARBIE
This model comes in Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR jacket, big
hair, a can of Skoal, a six-pack of Bud Light and a Hank, Jr. CD set. She
can spit over 7 feet and she can kick Ken's ass when she's drunk. An F-150
dual pickup is available with Confederate flag license plates and a Velcro
bed liner that keeps up tow rotweilers secure.
HICKORY BARBIE
This Barbie also has big hair, Daisy Duke style cut-off shorts and a halter
top that says "Class of 2206". Accessories include: a pack of Marlboros,
an infant wearing only a diaper, and a box of condoms. The Junior Prom kit
(sold Separately) includes a bottle of Southern Comfort, a set of teeth for
Barbie's special night out, a blanket and two of Ken's best friends.
NEWPORT NEWS BARBIE
Comes with a leaky mobile home and a mountain of oyster shells to pave the
drive or landscape the yard. The pockets of her designer sweat suit contain
a diamond-studded cell phone, food stamps and signed cards to prove she's
been to interviews so she can get her unemployment checks. 39 different sets
of glue-on nails are available.
SUFFOLK BARBIE
Has a Fubu t-shirt dress and $300 Nikes. A miniature copy of her GED is in
her purse. Boyfriend's Camaro actually lights underneath with lime green
neon, and has a working 6,000 watt stereo. Maid Brigade uniform for her
after class job, or you can play 'graduation' and get the flowered x-ray
tech scrub suit.
HAMPTON BARBIE
(A/K/A "Charlotte" or "The Church Lady") Has a complete Lane Bryant wardrobe
and two interchangeable hair-hats. Flat shoes slip on her flat feet,
perfect for waiting in the chow line at S&S after church. Hands actually
clasp needle and thread to finish her "Bloom Where You Are Planted"
needlepoint. Includes the First Baptist Ladies' Circle Recipe Book, a
remote door lock key fob for her Camry, and scratch-and-sniff "Old Lady"
perfume.
ODU STUDENT BARBIE
Starts out in the classic Barbie shape, but you can add on blobs of plastic
under her Britney Spears costume to show her first semester weight gain from
beer and junk food. Her brand new black Ford Explorer's gas gauge is fixed
on E and already has a bashed in fender. Cute and tiny designer backpack is
full of credit cards, fake ID, and emergency contact info for when she
passes out drunk on Hampton Blvd.
This princess Barbie is only sold at the MacArthur Centre. She comes with
Kenneth Cole 4-inch clunky shoes, an assortment of Kate spade handbags and a
Mercedes-Benz stretch limo. Options include: tummy tuck, face-lift and a
work-a-alcoholic Ken.
PORTSMOUTH BARBIE
This recently paroled Barbie come with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, and
a metallic orange low-rider '88 Pontiac with oversized wheels and tinted
windows. Julia, her DSS caseworker has curved arms that actually hold her
two babies as she takes them away.
VA BEACH NORTH END BARBIE
This yuppie Barbie comes with choice of a BMW sports car or a souped up
Hummer H2, also available is her 4,500 sq. ft. starter home built to
resemble Tara.
GREAT BRIDGE BARBIE
This trendy homemaker Barbie is available with the Lexus SUV or Ford
Windstar minivan, gets lost easily, and has no full time occupation or
secondary education. Comes with lots of oversized jewelry, all of it
genuine. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
OCEAN VIEW BARBIE
This model comes in Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR jacket, big
hair, a can of Skoal, a six-pack of Bud Light and a Hank, Jr. CD set. She
can spit over 7 feet and she can kick Ken's ass when she's drunk. An F-150
dual pickup is available with Confederate flag license plates and a Velcro
bed liner that keeps up tow rotweilers secure.
HICKORY BARBIE
This Barbie also has big hair, Daisy Duke style cut-off shorts and a halter
top that says "Class of 2206". Accessories include: a pack of Marlboros,
an infant wearing only a diaper, and a box of condoms. The Junior Prom kit
(sold Separately) includes a bottle of Southern Comfort, a set of teeth for
Barbie's special night out, a blanket and two of Ken's best friends.
NEWPORT NEWS BARBIE
Comes with a leaky mobile home and a mountain of oyster shells to pave the
drive or landscape the yard. The pockets of her designer sweat suit contain
a diamond-studded cell phone, food stamps and signed cards to prove she's
been to interviews so she can get her unemployment checks. 39 different sets
of glue-on nails are available.
SUFFOLK BARBIE
Has a Fubu t-shirt dress and $300 Nikes. A miniature copy of her GED is in
her purse. Boyfriend's Camaro actually lights underneath with lime green
neon, and has a working 6,000 watt stereo. Maid Brigade uniform for her
after class job, or you can play 'graduation' and get the flowered x-ray
tech scrub suit.
HAMPTON BARBIE
(A/K/A "Charlotte" or "The Church Lady") Has a complete Lane Bryant wardrobe
and two interchangeable hair-hats. Flat shoes slip on her flat feet,
perfect for waiting in the chow line at S&S after church. Hands actually
clasp needle and thread to finish her "Bloom Where You Are Planted"
needlepoint. Includes the First Baptist Ladies' Circle Recipe Book, a
remote door lock key fob for her Camry, and scratch-and-sniff "Old Lady"
perfume.
ODU STUDENT BARBIE
Starts out in the classic Barbie shape, but you can add on blobs of plastic
under her Britney Spears costume to show her first semester weight gain from
beer and junk food. Her brand new black Ford Explorer's gas gauge is fixed
on E and already has a bashed in fender. Cute and tiny designer backpack is
full of credit cards, fake ID, and emergency contact info for when she
passes out drunk on Hampton Blvd.