fuck being sick, again.

Feb 08, 2007 14:48

people should not take the health for granted. im sick of people pegging me as the sick kid when they have no idea how hard it is to be sick, all the fucking time. as i go to the hopsital, for a fourth fucking time in a month i want to kill evereyone around me for being healthier than i am, and thats not a good thing. honestly though, im sick and tired of being sick and tired. all i want  is to go one week without somehting going wrong. its not fair. i really dont think i deserve to be this sick all the time, why me? as pathetic as that sounds. honestly though, i just cant take it anymore.  the fact that i have to consider dropping out of school not because of grades or school work or friends or anything, but becuase im too sick. its not fucking fair. for once in my life i just want to be like every other fucking person walking around with out a care in the world. its just not fair. all i want is to be healthy, is that too much to ask? ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh health, thats all i ask for, fucking health. i feel like im in smash and everyone else keeps getting the floating pink hearts and refilling their health and i cant find any, its not fair. its not fair, its not fair, its not fair. i hate to complain like this, honestly, but i feel like i have a right to now. no one understands what its like to be this sick all the time. they make little jokes about how i need to be locked up in a hospital and shit and honestly, for a time it was funny, but not anymore. people just dont get how much it fucks you up to be sick all the time. it effects everything, your sleep, your work, your play, your eating, every little thing that could be effected, is. and i dont want to do it anymore. im just too tired, too burnt out.

i need a blunt.
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