In some places it's brown, you know.
Cat again.
I pretty much feel a combination of fear, severe anxiety, dread, and embarrassment.
I basically made a fool of myself last night, or I guess very early this morning. I'm not sure if Matt is going to speak to me today at all, but I'm very nervous about it all. I just wish I hadn't said anything when he asked what was wrong so that everything would be fine instead of...sort of...I don't even know. I have no idea how the situation stands. I'm confused too, because he seemed not angry but perhaps disappointed in me, but he texted me after I left his place to say he was sorry (even though he had nothing to be sorry for), so I'm thinking things are semi-OK, only he hasn't called. And I'm much too afraid to call him in case he is angry after all.
At any rate, I'm going to make an appointment with my doctor soon so I can treat my anxiety. I constantly feel on the verge of tears or like I'm going to really have a nervous breakdown. Ha, I just called and the earliest time he had available was June 22. Looks like I'll have to just do my best until then. Curse me for having one of the best doctors in the city!