Until Now (Part 3)
Written by:
ovielove and
hockey_joy
Title: Until Now
Chapter: 3
Pairing: Vincent Lecavalier / Ben Clymer
Notes: Takes place during the Tampa Bay Lightning's 1999-2000 season; work in progress...
Part 1 / 2
It had been two weeks since Ben and I had collided in the hallway, two weeks of long nights holding my cell in my hand, two weeks of my finger hovering over the dial button with his number on the screen, two weeks of brushing off Brad's concerned questions about why I wasn't sleeping. I had been avoiding Ben as much as possible without being obvious. I found myself constantly watching him though, during practice, during games as I sat on the bench. Coach had pulled me aside last night after the game, telling me how disappointed he was in me and that he had made a mistake making me captain. He told me to get my shit together for next season.
As I settled into my seat on the team plane headed home after a road trip to end the season, I noticed Ben making his way down the aisle. I was glad that the guys had warmed to his presence, including him in conversations and hanging out as the season had gone on. I watched as he bent down to talk to someone, his hand gripping the seat back, my body remembering the way he had dug his fingers into my shoulders and felt a shiver run down my spine as he laughed at whatever the person had said.
He glanced up, looking around until his gaze met mine, the cool heat of his eyes piercing and I could feel myself get semi-hard.I gave him a smile that I'm sure looked forced and awkward, looking away reluctantly as Brad sat down beside me, pulling out his video game. He flashed me a grin before turning his attention to the game. I glanced back up at Ben only he wasn't there. I sighed, resting my head against the window, letting the glass cool my hot cheeks, thinking about the disappointing season we had just finished.
That smile...god, it had been enough to make my stomach turn to jelly. I wanted to smile back, but Brad sliding into the seat next to him broke our eye contact and brought me back down to earth. I turned and hurried back up the aisle to my seat before he could look my way again. What was I doing? All I had been able to think about was that kiss, his leg between my thighs, the pressure of his swollen cock pushing against mine, our bodies melting together... two weeks of those images flashing through my mind. It was a wonder I hadn't gone insane.
So many times I had wanted to grab him in the hallway, or in the shower, or even here on the plane - but aside from the fact that people were around, I was also constantly reminded that he had someone else, someone who, from the way he acted around Vinny, clearly loved him. I couldn't do it, couldn't be the man who broke up a loving couple...not after someone had done it to me. There was something about him, though - a vulnerability under that strong exterior that made me want to take care of him, watch over him. And was I crazy, or had he looked annoyed when Brad had appeared? I pushed the thought out of my mind and lay my head back in my chair, closing my eyes and reflecting on the season that had ended too quickly, and the kiss that had ended the same way.
Halfway through our four hour flight back from Ottawa, I had to get up to stretch. Even though the charter offered a bit more leg room than an average plane it was never enough for me. I stepped over Brad who had fallen asleep and headed towards the back of the plane to grab a drink from the attendant.
It was dark and very quiet on the plane, most of the guys I had passed were asleep, some of them reading. I finished my water and started back to my seat. I stopped, ready to climb back over Brad when I noticed that the light above Ben's seat was on. I glanced down at Brad, seeing that he was dead to the world and made my way to Ben. I crouched down in the aisle next to him, putting my hand on his leg softly so I didn't startle him. He turned his head to look at me, pulling his headphones off and setting his book down. I whispered, gesturing to the empty seat, "May I?"
I stared down into Vinny's questioning face. "Sure," I replied, trying in vain to keep my voice from shaking at the feel of his hand on me once again. I stood halfway to let him slide past, which he did painfully slowly, rubbing up against me as he moved into the window seat. We sat in silence for a moment, avoiding each other's gaze. His arm was lying on the armrest next to me and I stared at it, the muscular outline tensing slightly as he gripped the leather cover, kneading it with his perfect fingers. I tore my eyes away and forced them up to meet Vinny's, which seemed to be laughing at me as though he had known what I was thinking. I smiled weakly and shifted in my seat but held his gaze. "Do you, um, do you think we should talk?"
I nodded at him, keeping my grip on the arm rest so I couldn't reach over to cup his jaw and run my thumb along his jaw, across that dimple in his chin, over his soft lips, into his mouth. I shook my head to clear it and he looked at me quizzically. "Yes, I mean, I think we should." I leaned my head back on the seat, turning to him, catching the same scent of soap and Ben that had intoxicated me in the hallway. I wanted to explain to him what I had been feeling since then but without thinking I bent my head down, placing a kiss on his neck, right beneath his ear where his hair curled just so. His skin was smooth and warm under my lips, and I flicked my tongue out lightly, tasting him.
I closed my eyes, feeling the heat of his breath, the warm wet of his tongue as it traced a path across my neck. All thoughts ran out of my head as the blood rushed from my brain to my groin, and I felt my pants tighten as he continued to explore. His lips found that place right below my ear, that spot I loved, and I gasped involuntarily, my hand reaching out and gripping his knee tightly without thinking.
Suddenly I heard the snoring teammate behind me shift and murmur softly in his sleep and I froze, my mind slowly clearing as I realized where we were. My eyes flew open as Vinny continued to tease my neck and I jerked my head back, slamming it into the headrest by accident and separating his silky tongue from my skin. I swallowed hard and turned to face him, muttering under my breath, "Are you crazy? What if someone saw?" I was trying to act angry but my breathing hadn't returned to normal and my dick was still swollen, betraying me in its protrusion.
Fuck. Ben was right. I sighed, dropping my gaze which landed on his crotch, I could see he was aroused as I was. I sat back and crossed my arms over my chest. If I tucked my hands away, I wouldn't be tempted to grab him. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to calm my racing heart but all I could see was Ben, the way he smiled, the way he got angry during a game, the way his eyes always seemed to find mine. I looked at him, keeping my distance.
"Ben..." I sighed again as I reached up to turn the light off, turning to face him but still not touching. "I have to be honest, I don't know what's going on anymore. I'm sorry for pushing you around in the hall that day, that's not me at all." I glanced quickly around and upon seeing that no one was looking, I slipped my hand around his neck and pulled him closer to me so that our noses were touching. "I'm not sorry for this though," I whispered brushing my lips against his as I spoke. I felt him open them slightly and I slipped my tongue inside briefly before pulling away, leaning back against the side of the plane.
I watched Vinny rest his head on the wall, his long neck smooth and perfect as it craned away from me. My lips still burned with the feeling of his mouth on mine, my ears with the sound of his whispers. I closed my eyes and thrust my head back against the seat in frustration, willing my dick to deflate so I could rest. The knowledge that Vinny was so close, the heat of his body warming my arm, made it impossible to stop my mind from racing.
I kept my body still but surreptitiously reached out my hand, placing it on Vinny's stomach and gripping his shirt, pulling it out from the waistband of his jeans, sliding my fingers underneath the thin cotton and spreading them out to feel the taut edges of his six pack. I could feel his breath catch as I stroked his warm skin, keeping my head facing forward as my hand danced across his stomach. He had some sort of control over me, making me do things I knew I shouldn't. My head was screaming out for me to stop, repeating the same words I had just said to him moments before, but my body had other ideas, I felt his hand close over mine and I held my breath as he moved it down to his pants and the ever growing bump at his crotch.
I needed Ben to know how much I wanted him and I think he got a pretty good idea as I traced the outline of my cock with his hand. I gripped his hand tightly and turned to him suddenly, making him jump. I put my mouth against his ear and whispered, "Do you see what you do to me? I can't stop thinking about you. All I want to do is fuck you." I bit down on his earlobe, elicting a low groan from him and I tugged on it with my teeth until I felt him grip me through my jeans.
Somehow out of the corner of my eye, I caught movement behind me as someone walked down the aisle toward us. I threw Ben's hand back on his lap and sat back against my seat just as Brad approached us. "Hey, I woke up and you were gone," he said as he knelt on a seat in the row ahead of us. He grinned and looked from Ben to me, "So whatcha guys doing up here?" I glanced at Ben and back at Brad, "Not much, just chatting. What time do we land again?" He checked his watch, "In about half an hour." I nodded, "Alright. You go sit down, I'll be right there." He nodded and headed back down the aisle.
I studied Vinny's now expressionless face as Brad walked away, leaving us to recover from our heated state. I glanced down at both our laps and was acutely aware of our cocks, each straining to be released. Luckily Brad hadn't noticed, but it was close, far too close. What was worse was the way Vinny had tossed my hand aside, the way he could pretend that nothing was happening as soon as Brad had appeared. Anger started to bubble up inside of me and I suddenly had an urge to punch him right in his perfect nose.
Instead I stood up shakily, picking up my coat to use as a cover and stepping into the aisle. Vinny looked up at me, his dark eyes questioning as I moved away. "I'm going to get a drink and cool down," I murmured, leaning into the seats so only he could hear me. "You go on back to your boy - you want to fuck someone? Fuck him. And fuck you." I dropped my jacket on the chair, the anger forcing the passion away and making it safe to walk uncovered, and I stormed up the aisle.
I turned, watching Ben head towards the front of the plane. I stood slowly, looking back at my seat where Brad was waiting for me. He gave me a smile and I'm sure mine back was more like a grimace. I held one finger up, indicating I would be there in a minute and followed Ben's path to the attendant's station. I touched the arm of the lady pouring Ben's drink, "Could you give us a second please?" She nodded politely and stepped aside, pulling the curtain shut behind her.
I turned to Ben, his jaw clenched, his lips white as he pressed them together. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes flashed with anger. I took the glass from his hand, placing it on the counter beside us and stepped close to him, pushing him back with a hand on his chest, into the corner so he had nowhere to go. I could feel his body giving off heat as I leaned in, placing my hand on the wall by the side of his head. "Listen to me. All I'm asking for is a bit of time to figure things out between me and him," I jerked my head back towards the seats behind us. I searched his eyes with mine, "Can you do that for me?"
I took a breath in, feeling my anger fade as his fingers wrapped themselves delicately in my hair. I looked down at my feet, not sure what the right response was. "I don't know," I finally said, avoiding his eyes. "If you're saying it's over between the two of you, fine, but you need to be sure that's what you want. Don't end it because of me." I looked up and my expression softened slightly. Damn, he was beautiful. After a minute I realized I was staring and I shifted my eyes away. "Look..." I started, then trailed off. I wanted to tell him everything, wanted to explain that I'd been hurt before, that if he wanted me it had to only be me and no one else, that I needed to know I was the only one. But I chickened out. "Just don't end it because of me," I repeated.
I smiled slowly at him, watching him give me a tentative one back. I pulled his body close, enveloping him in a hug, feeling his heart pound against my chest. I stroked his hair, trying to ease the tension I felt in his body, urging him to relax against me for just a second. Never before had someone reached out to comfort me the way he had in the hall that day, Brad being the one that should have. I rested my cheek against Ben's head, feeling his soft hair curl against my skin. I took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his shampoo, the scent of his body and sighed as he slipped his arms around me.
"I don't know how much I can give right now," I whispered, "But I want you to know that I'm yours and yours alone." I placed a light kiss on his head, feeling a peace that I had never known. The curtain pulled back slightly, with the attendant peeking around. She averted her eyes as soon as she saw us but stepped closer, keeping her voice low, "I'm sorry to interrupt but the captian is preparing to land and I need you to return to your seats." I had to give it up to her for being discreet. I'm sure she had seen stranger things than two guys hugging. I held Ben for a second longer before pulling back, "Thank you." I ran a light finger down his cheek. "We'll figure this out, I promise."
ovielove and
hockey_joy
Title: Until Now
Chapter: 3
Pairing: Vincent Lecavalier / Ben Clymer
Notes: Takes place during the Tampa Bay Lightning's 1999-2000 season; work in progress...
Part 1 / 2
It had been two weeks since Ben and I had collided in the hallway, two weeks of long nights holding my cell in my hand, two weeks of my finger hovering over the dial button with his number on the screen, two weeks of brushing off Brad's concerned questions about why I wasn't sleeping. I had been avoiding Ben as much as possible without being obvious. I found myself constantly watching him though, during practice, during games as I sat on the bench. Coach had pulled me aside last night after the game, telling me how disappointed he was in me and that he had made a mistake making me captain. He told me to get my shit together for next season.
As I settled into my seat on the team plane headed home after a road trip to end the season, I noticed Ben making his way down the aisle. I was glad that the guys had warmed to his presence, including him in conversations and hanging out as the season had gone on. I watched as he bent down to talk to someone, his hand gripping the seat back, my body remembering the way he had dug his fingers into my shoulders and felt a shiver run down my spine as he laughed at whatever the person had said.
He glanced up, looking around until his gaze met mine, the cool heat of his eyes piercing and I could feel myself get semi-hard.I gave him a smile that I'm sure looked forced and awkward, looking away reluctantly as Brad sat down beside me, pulling out his video game. He flashed me a grin before turning his attention to the game. I glanced back up at Ben only he wasn't there. I sighed, resting my head against the window, letting the glass cool my hot cheeks, thinking about the disappointing season we had just finished.
That smile...god, it had been enough to make my stomach turn to jelly. I wanted to smile back, but Brad sliding into the seat next to him broke our eye contact and brought me back down to earth. I turned and hurried back up the aisle to my seat before he could look my way again. What was I doing? All I had been able to think about was that kiss, his leg between my thighs, the pressure of his swollen cock pushing against mine, our bodies melting together... two weeks of those images flashing through my mind. It was a wonder I hadn't gone insane.
So many times I had wanted to grab him in the hallway, or in the shower, or even here on the plane - but aside from the fact that people were around, I was also constantly reminded that he had someone else, someone who, from the way he acted around Vinny, clearly loved him. I couldn't do it, couldn't be the man who broke up a loving couple...not after someone had done it to me. There was something about him, though - a vulnerability under that strong exterior that made me want to take care of him, watch over him. And was I crazy, or had he looked annoyed when Brad had appeared? I pushed the thought out of my mind and lay my head back in my chair, closing my eyes and reflecting on the season that had ended too quickly, and the kiss that had ended the same way.
Halfway through our four hour flight back from Ottawa, I had to get up to stretch. Even though the charter offered a bit more leg room than an average plane it was never enough for me. I stepped over Brad who had fallen asleep and headed towards the back of the plane to grab a drink from the attendant.
It was dark and very quiet on the plane, most of the guys I had passed were asleep, some of them reading. I finished my water and started back to my seat. I stopped, ready to climb back over Brad when I noticed that the light above Ben's seat was on. I glanced down at Brad, seeing that he was dead to the world and made my way to Ben. I crouched down in the aisle next to him, putting my hand on his leg softly so I didn't startle him. He turned his head to look at me, pulling his headphones off and setting his book down. I whispered, gesturing to the empty seat, "May I?"
I stared down into Vinny's questioning face. "Sure," I replied, trying in vain to keep my voice from shaking at the feel of his hand on me once again. I stood halfway to let him slide past, which he did painfully slowly, rubbing up against me as he moved into the window seat. We sat in silence for a moment, avoiding each other's gaze. His arm was lying on the armrest next to me and I stared at it, the muscular outline tensing slightly as he gripped the leather cover, kneading it with his perfect fingers. I tore my eyes away and forced them up to meet Vinny's, which seemed to be laughing at me as though he had known what I was thinking. I smiled weakly and shifted in my seat but held his gaze. "Do you, um, do you think we should talk?"
I nodded at him, keeping my grip on the arm rest so I couldn't reach over to cup his jaw and run my thumb along his jaw, across that dimple in his chin, over his soft lips, into his mouth. I shook my head to clear it and he looked at me quizzically. "Yes, I mean, I think we should." I leaned my head back on the seat, turning to him, catching the same scent of soap and Ben that had intoxicated me in the hallway. I wanted to explain to him what I had been feeling since then but without thinking I bent my head down, placing a kiss on his neck, right beneath his ear where his hair curled just so. His skin was smooth and warm under my lips, and I flicked my tongue out lightly, tasting him.
I closed my eyes, feeling the heat of his breath, the warm wet of his tongue as it traced a path across my neck. All thoughts ran out of my head as the blood rushed from my brain to my groin, and I felt my pants tighten as he continued to explore. His lips found that place right below my ear, that spot I loved, and I gasped involuntarily, my hand reaching out and gripping his knee tightly without thinking.
Suddenly I heard the snoring teammate behind me shift and murmur softly in his sleep and I froze, my mind slowly clearing as I realized where we were. My eyes flew open as Vinny continued to tease my neck and I jerked my head back, slamming it into the headrest by accident and separating his silky tongue from my skin. I swallowed hard and turned to face him, muttering under my breath, "Are you crazy? What if someone saw?" I was trying to act angry but my breathing hadn't returned to normal and my dick was still swollen, betraying me in its protrusion.
Fuck. Ben was right. I sighed, dropping my gaze which landed on his crotch, I could see he was aroused as I was. I sat back and crossed my arms over my chest. If I tucked my hands away, I wouldn't be tempted to grab him. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to calm my racing heart but all I could see was Ben, the way he smiled, the way he got angry during a game, the way his eyes always seemed to find mine. I looked at him, keeping my distance.
"Ben..." I sighed again as I reached up to turn the light off, turning to face him but still not touching. "I have to be honest, I don't know what's going on anymore. I'm sorry for pushing you around in the hall that day, that's not me at all." I glanced quickly around and upon seeing that no one was looking, I slipped my hand around his neck and pulled him closer to me so that our noses were touching. "I'm not sorry for this though," I whispered brushing my lips against his as I spoke. I felt him open them slightly and I slipped my tongue inside briefly before pulling away, leaning back against the side of the plane.
I watched Vinny rest his head on the wall, his long neck smooth and perfect as it craned away from me. My lips still burned with the feeling of his mouth on mine, my ears with the sound of his whispers. I closed my eyes and thrust my head back against the seat in frustration, willing my dick to deflate so I could rest. The knowledge that Vinny was so close, the heat of his body warming my arm, made it impossible to stop my mind from racing.
I kept my body still but surreptitiously reached out my hand, placing it on Vinny's stomach and gripping his shirt, pulling it out from the waistband of his jeans, sliding my fingers underneath the thin cotton and spreading them out to feel the taut edges of his six pack. I could feel his breath catch as I stroked his warm skin, keeping my head facing forward as my hand danced across his stomach. He had some sort of control over me, making me do things I knew I shouldn't. My head was screaming out for me to stop, repeating the same words I had just said to him moments before, but my body had other ideas, I felt his hand close over mine and I held my breath as he moved it down to his pants and the ever growing bump at his crotch.
I needed Ben to know how much I wanted him and I think he got a pretty good idea as I traced the outline of my cock with his hand. I gripped his hand tightly and turned to him suddenly, making him jump. I put my mouth against his ear and whispered, "Do you see what you do to me? I can't stop thinking about you. All I want to do is fuck you." I bit down on his earlobe, elicting a low groan from him and I tugged on it with my teeth until I felt him grip me through my jeans.
Somehow out of the corner of my eye, I caught movement behind me as someone walked down the aisle toward us. I threw Ben's hand back on his lap and sat back against my seat just as Brad approached us. "Hey, I woke up and you were gone," he said as he knelt on a seat in the row ahead of us. He grinned and looked from Ben to me, "So whatcha guys doing up here?" I glanced at Ben and back at Brad, "Not much, just chatting. What time do we land again?" He checked his watch, "In about half an hour." I nodded, "Alright. You go sit down, I'll be right there." He nodded and headed back down the aisle.
I studied Vinny's now expressionless face as Brad walked away, leaving us to recover from our heated state. I glanced down at both our laps and was acutely aware of our cocks, each straining to be released. Luckily Brad hadn't noticed, but it was close, far too close. What was worse was the way Vinny had tossed my hand aside, the way he could pretend that nothing was happening as soon as Brad had appeared. Anger started to bubble up inside of me and I suddenly had an urge to punch him right in his perfect nose.
Instead I stood up shakily, picking up my coat to use as a cover and stepping into the aisle. Vinny looked up at me, his dark eyes questioning as I moved away. "I'm going to get a drink and cool down," I murmured, leaning into the seats so only he could hear me. "You go on back to your boy - you want to fuck someone? Fuck him. And fuck you." I dropped my jacket on the chair, the anger forcing the passion away and making it safe to walk uncovered, and I stormed up the aisle.
I turned, watching Ben head towards the front of the plane. I stood slowly, looking back at my seat where Brad was waiting for me. He gave me a smile and I'm sure mine back was more like a grimace. I held one finger up, indicating I would be there in a minute and followed Ben's path to the attendant's station. I touched the arm of the lady pouring Ben's drink, "Could you give us a second please?" She nodded politely and stepped aside, pulling the curtain shut behind her.
I turned to Ben, his jaw clenched, his lips white as he pressed them together. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes flashed with anger. I took the glass from his hand, placing it on the counter beside us and stepped close to him, pushing him back with a hand on his chest, into the corner so he had nowhere to go. I could feel his body giving off heat as I leaned in, placing my hand on the wall by the side of his head. "Listen to me. All I'm asking for is a bit of time to figure things out between me and him," I jerked my head back towards the seats behind us. I searched his eyes with mine, "Can you do that for me?"
I took a breath in, feeling my anger fade as his fingers wrapped themselves delicately in my hair. I looked down at my feet, not sure what the right response was. "I don't know," I finally said, avoiding his eyes. "If you're saying it's over between the two of you, fine, but you need to be sure that's what you want. Don't end it because of me." I looked up and my expression softened slightly. Damn, he was beautiful. After a minute I realized I was staring and I shifted my eyes away. "Look..." I started, then trailed off. I wanted to tell him everything, wanted to explain that I'd been hurt before, that if he wanted me it had to only be me and no one else, that I needed to know I was the only one. But I chickened out. "Just don't end it because of me," I repeated.
I smiled slowly at him, watching him give me a tentative one back. I pulled his body close, enveloping him in a hug, feeling his heart pound against my chest. I stroked his hair, trying to ease the tension I felt in his body, urging him to relax against me for just a second. Never before had someone reached out to comfort me the way he had in the hall that day, Brad being the one that should have. I rested my cheek against Ben's head, feeling his soft hair curl against my skin. I took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his shampoo, the scent of his body and sighed as he slipped his arms around me.
"I don't know how much I can give right now," I whispered, "But I want you to know that I'm yours and yours alone." I placed a light kiss on his head, feeling a peace that I had never known. The curtain pulled back slightly, with the attendant peeking around. She averted her eyes as soon as she saw us but stepped closer, keeping her voice low, "I'm sorry to interrupt but the captian is preparing to land and I need you to return to your seats." I had to give it up to her for being discreet. I'm sure she had seen stranger things than two guys hugging. I held Ben for a second longer before pulling back, "Thank you." I ran a light finger down his cheek. "We'll figure this out, I promise."