Fic: Life Line
Title: Life Line
Pairing: Todd Bertuzzi/Markus Naslund
Rating:PG-13
Disclaimer: this is made up; therefore, it is not true.
AN: i tried something new, the POV. so let me know if it works or not.
If it was anyone else, they would think that he is an ill-tempered man, a ticking time bomb perhaps, yet you know better. Yes, Todd likes to keep to himself. Yes, he constantly looks grouchy. But you know better.
When the trade happened, he wanted you to know first that he called at two in the morning his time, just so he wouldn’t interrupt your sleep. And even though you’ll never admit it out loud, it was the hardest conversation you’ve ever had. It started off with mumbled words, until you demanded he speak up and he did. Then there was silence, on both ends until you opened your mouth but instead of words, out came a sob. Todd’s apologies began to pour out, which confused you because what did he have to be sorry for? But the more you said it was ok, that it wasn’t his fault, the more he insisted that it was. You hated hearing the hurt in his voice, the choked sobs. You knew he was trying to fight it, trying to be the strong one. But all it did was make you hurt more. You were never good with holding your emotions anyway. One sob led to another and in the end, both of you were crying and apologizing, yet trying to comfort each other at the same time. Silence took over once again, except for the odd sniffle, until he told you, very shakily, that if you wanted, you two could keep this going. Yes, it was going to take some work, but it was worth it, right? You said yes automatically, and promised to talk everyday because he’s worth it. After many don’t worry’s and I love you’s, you hung up the phone and hoped there wouldn’t be any more conversations like that one.
Now you sit with the phone pressed against your ear, feeling guilty. The promise of calling, or communicating somehow, everyday, was broken. Not only by you, him too, but you feel that you should have initiated more. But with busy schedules on and off the ice, you hardly found time. No, it wasn’t that you didn’t want to talk to him. There are days that you wish you could just fly down to see him just so you could curl up with him and talk about nonsense. However, you just can’t seem to get any alone time. So now you try your best, asking him about everything and anything but all you get are monosyllable responses. Except when you ask about his back, he goes off, referring to it as if it were another human being, a very annoying human being. You hate it that he’s frustrated, hate it that he can’t play. So you tell him that soon he’ll be back and lighting it up exactly how he started the season. He snorts before going quiet again. And you mentally kick yourself for that. You ask about Alex and Brian, but he doesn’t say much. So you try another approach, asking how Tag and Jaden are doing and you know you’ve hit the jackpot because he’s talking a mile a minute, just absolutely ecstatic about how Tag never seems to want to leave his side and how Jaden is fitting in at school. You listen with a smile because this is how it should be. The conversation shifts to golf, but you don’t care; as long as Todd is talking, and more than one word, you’re happy.
Somewhere between nine irons and putters, you’ve stopped listening to the words and instead, focus on his voice until he abruptly stops. You automatically think the line has been cut so you say his name. There’s nothing except faint sounds, not words exactly, more like an attempt. So you say his name again and this time he replies with yours as a sob. He’s saying something but it’s hard to understand because his voice is thick with sudden emotion that worries you instantly. You try to calm him by telling him that you love him, that you’re here with him no matter what, that he’ll be back and playing in no time. You know it may not all be true, but its what you can offer right now. It takes awhile for him to regain composure, but you repeat your words like a mantra anyhow. His rhythmic breathing soothes you too, making you realize you need him as much as he needs you.
After awhile of breathing and listening to him breathe, you start talking about Mo and how he’s planning a fishing trip with the three of you and the only way you’ll go is if he goes. For some reason, that makes him chuckle and you feel like you can breathe a little easier. You ramble on about team events, fundraisers and Trevor’s crazy enthusiasm with all of it. He’s gone back to few word answers, but that doesn’t bother you anymore because you know he’s ok now. He needed that release and now all he wants to do is listen to you go on about yourself. A half an hour later and you’re still talking about potential plans for the summer when he yawns. You don’t want this conversation to end but you know Florida is three hours ahead and it’s getting late. So you whisper your goodbye and smile when he wishes you a goodnight. Before he hangs up, he thanks you, you don’t ask what for but tell him you’ll call him tomorrow. And every night after that. And hope you’ll never break another promise ever again.
Pairing: Todd Bertuzzi/Markus Naslund
Rating:PG-13
Disclaimer: this is made up; therefore, it is not true.
AN: i tried something new, the POV. so let me know if it works or not.
If it was anyone else, they would think that he is an ill-tempered man, a ticking time bomb perhaps, yet you know better. Yes, Todd likes to keep to himself. Yes, he constantly looks grouchy. But you know better.
When the trade happened, he wanted you to know first that he called at two in the morning his time, just so he wouldn’t interrupt your sleep. And even though you’ll never admit it out loud, it was the hardest conversation you’ve ever had. It started off with mumbled words, until you demanded he speak up and he did. Then there was silence, on both ends until you opened your mouth but instead of words, out came a sob. Todd’s apologies began to pour out, which confused you because what did he have to be sorry for? But the more you said it was ok, that it wasn’t his fault, the more he insisted that it was. You hated hearing the hurt in his voice, the choked sobs. You knew he was trying to fight it, trying to be the strong one. But all it did was make you hurt more. You were never good with holding your emotions anyway. One sob led to another and in the end, both of you were crying and apologizing, yet trying to comfort each other at the same time. Silence took over once again, except for the odd sniffle, until he told you, very shakily, that if you wanted, you two could keep this going. Yes, it was going to take some work, but it was worth it, right? You said yes automatically, and promised to talk everyday because he’s worth it. After many don’t worry’s and I love you’s, you hung up the phone and hoped there wouldn’t be any more conversations like that one.
Now you sit with the phone pressed against your ear, feeling guilty. The promise of calling, or communicating somehow, everyday, was broken. Not only by you, him too, but you feel that you should have initiated more. But with busy schedules on and off the ice, you hardly found time. No, it wasn’t that you didn’t want to talk to him. There are days that you wish you could just fly down to see him just so you could curl up with him and talk about nonsense. However, you just can’t seem to get any alone time. So now you try your best, asking him about everything and anything but all you get are monosyllable responses. Except when you ask about his back, he goes off, referring to it as if it were another human being, a very annoying human being. You hate it that he’s frustrated, hate it that he can’t play. So you tell him that soon he’ll be back and lighting it up exactly how he started the season. He snorts before going quiet again. And you mentally kick yourself for that. You ask about Alex and Brian, but he doesn’t say much. So you try another approach, asking how Tag and Jaden are doing and you know you’ve hit the jackpot because he’s talking a mile a minute, just absolutely ecstatic about how Tag never seems to want to leave his side and how Jaden is fitting in at school. You listen with a smile because this is how it should be. The conversation shifts to golf, but you don’t care; as long as Todd is talking, and more than one word, you’re happy.
Somewhere between nine irons and putters, you’ve stopped listening to the words and instead, focus on his voice until he abruptly stops. You automatically think the line has been cut so you say his name. There’s nothing except faint sounds, not words exactly, more like an attempt. So you say his name again and this time he replies with yours as a sob. He’s saying something but it’s hard to understand because his voice is thick with sudden emotion that worries you instantly. You try to calm him by telling him that you love him, that you’re here with him no matter what, that he’ll be back and playing in no time. You know it may not all be true, but its what you can offer right now. It takes awhile for him to regain composure, but you repeat your words like a mantra anyhow. His rhythmic breathing soothes you too, making you realize you need him as much as he needs you.
After awhile of breathing and listening to him breathe, you start talking about Mo and how he’s planning a fishing trip with the three of you and the only way you’ll go is if he goes. For some reason, that makes him chuckle and you feel like you can breathe a little easier. You ramble on about team events, fundraisers and Trevor’s crazy enthusiasm with all of it. He’s gone back to few word answers, but that doesn’t bother you anymore because you know he’s ok now. He needed that release and now all he wants to do is listen to you go on about yourself. A half an hour later and you’re still talking about potential plans for the summer when he yawns. You don’t want this conversation to end but you know Florida is three hours ahead and it’s getting late. So you whisper your goodbye and smile when he wishes you a goodnight. Before he hangs up, he thanks you, you don’t ask what for but tell him you’ll call him tomorrow. And every night after that. And hope you’ll never break another promise ever again.