American History in Two Versions

Aug 08, 2010 14:50

Having enjoyed stormwreath 's presentation of British history, I thought it would be fun to write up the American version.  As it happens, I need to give two versions.

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Comments 38

stormwreath August 8 2010, 19:50:55 UTC
Fascinating. :-)

The thought occurs to me that one big difference between the British and the Americans is that you either think your ancestors were magnificent, or you think they were bastards; while we think all our ancestors were Magnificent Bastards. It explain a lot...

we beat them again.

I gather than the popular history of Canada goes something like this:

French fur traders set up outposts.
The British come along and capture them.
Lots of refugees come here from America after the revolution.
1812 WE BURN DOWN THE WHITE HOUSE! HA HA! TAKE THAT, YANKS!!!
We gain independence from Britain peacefully, more or less.
Nothing much happens after that.

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rahirah August 8 2010, 20:02:30 UTC
Going by Anne of Green Gables, the Canadians also think they won WW I & II single-handedly, with a little help from a few other countries.

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local_max August 11 2010, 17:30:47 UTC
I have a friend who is exactly like this. Do not ever, ever bring up Vimy Ridge to him if you want to talk about anything else for the next three hours. Most Canadians don't really think that.

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2maggie2 August 8 2010, 20:09:47 UTC
Your Canadian history runs six lines longer than anything I've ever learned anywhere about Canadian history. But we do know that Canadians say 'eh' a lot and mispronounce about. Also, it's cold there and they like maple leaves.

The two versions of American history both have the essential American theme: love us or hate us, we are The Protagonist. We will either save the world or destroy it. I think that's why I tend to be anti-protagonist.

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slaymesoftly August 8 2010, 19:53:04 UTC
Awesome - and funny. (and more than a little true...)

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2maggie2 August 8 2010, 20:11:11 UTC
Glad you enjoyed!

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sidhlairiel August 8 2010, 20:11:30 UTC
Oh man, that line about beating Hitler made me crack up. I remember studying in the US and my classmates being convinced that WWII did not begin until 1941 when America joined in xD

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2maggie2 August 8 2010, 20:48:13 UTC
The important parts of World War II happened after we joined, the rest was just prologue setting up why we were needed to come in and save the day!

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harsens_rob August 14 2010, 07:01:48 UTC
Because, as we all know, the world basically did nothing of note until after we became Independent.

Things only matter if we have our hat in the ring....

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simonf August 8 2010, 21:37:05 UTC
2maggie2 August 9 2010, 03:29:10 UTC
Hey, my folks voted for him twice! He kind of looked like my Dad, so I always got them confused.

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gabrielleabelle August 8 2010, 23:19:45 UTC
Huh. Texas high schools very much downplay the massive racism, the genocide of the Native Americans, and the importance of slavery in the Civil War (really. It was all about "states' rights" to own slaves).

The Mexicans surrounded a bunch of us at the Alamo and killed everybody and we are never going to forget this, though nobody really knows what any of that was about.

Hey! The battle at the Alamo was about the persevering Texan spirit! ...or something...

...Santa Ana doesn't come from the North Pole. Thanks, I'll be here all night.

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stormwreath August 9 2010, 01:21:35 UTC
But is Santa Anna the wife of Santa Claus??

Almost all I know about the Alamo is that Travis drew a line in the sand, and over the line crossed a hundred and seventy-nine. :-)

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gabrielleabelle August 9 2010, 01:27:32 UTC
Hell, I've been to the Alamo multiple times, and I still can't remember what the damn thing was about. All I know is I resented having to watch some stupid John Wayne movie about it in junior high. Oh, and Bowie had a bad-ass knife of some sort. And Davy Crockett was some Gary Stu. Actually, I think all the Alamo dudes were Gary Stus. Maybe that's why I lost interest.

Though I didn't know they taught about the Alamo outside of Texas. As I recall, the events went down before Texas became a state, so...

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stormwreath August 9 2010, 02:34:18 UTC
They don't *teach* about it in Britain, but the John Wayne film was shown here. (And I was quoting a line from a Donovan song.)

'Remember the Alamo', the Gunfight at the OK Corrall, General Custer, High Noon, stagecoaches, steam trains with cow-catchers on the front, cowboys and Indians, Clint Eastwood in a poncho, deserts and cacti, and "We'll head them off at the pass!" all blend together in a big dusty bundle called "American history in the 19th century" for us.

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