(no subject)
I'm so tired right now, and want to go back to bed. I think I might after this. I know we're suppose to head to B's moms today, but ugh! This period shit is for the birds. I'm not going to have any kids, so lets cut the bullshit shall we?!!
Off and on lately I've been missing bits and pieces of home. I miss my family, but thats really not why I'm missing home. I miss some of the things there. I miss going to a dartmouth hockey game, getting pizza at Ramunto's, grabbing a coffee at Dirt Cowboy, driving to Tilton's outlet mall, taking the mile hike down to the gorge, and other things that I have found calming back home.
Its wierd, b/c sometimes I think....what will happen in later years as I get older? Will I be the first to pass on from this life or will it be B? If B goes first, where will I end up? Back in NH where what little of my family is left?...b/c by that time, I'm sure my mother and step father will have passed, and my sister will be of ripe old age. I know this thinking is a bit morbid and I shouldnt think of it, b/c I have many years til that point.
I have no connections here in NY. No friends of my own, and the people I know here are connected to Beck. I guess I'm just a sad individual, with major emotional issues, that always thinks of the worst.
Plus...I contribute this morbid thinking to my period right now. It puts me in a depressing state of mind.
I'm going to go prepare myelf for a nap...that is, if I dont wake Beck up.
Off and on lately I've been missing bits and pieces of home. I miss my family, but thats really not why I'm missing home. I miss some of the things there. I miss going to a dartmouth hockey game, getting pizza at Ramunto's, grabbing a coffee at Dirt Cowboy, driving to Tilton's outlet mall, taking the mile hike down to the gorge, and other things that I have found calming back home.
Its wierd, b/c sometimes I think....what will happen in later years as I get older? Will I be the first to pass on from this life or will it be B? If B goes first, where will I end up? Back in NH where what little of my family is left?...b/c by that time, I'm sure my mother and step father will have passed, and my sister will be of ripe old age. I know this thinking is a bit morbid and I shouldnt think of it, b/c I have many years til that point.
I have no connections here in NY. No friends of my own, and the people I know here are connected to Beck. I guess I'm just a sad individual, with major emotional issues, that always thinks of the worst.
Plus...I contribute this morbid thinking to my period right now. It puts me in a depressing state of mind.
I'm going to go prepare myelf for a nap...that is, if I dont wake Beck up.