(no subject)
this is what ive been up to since the last time, ive been going with dj and alex after school, going to the harbor, smoking a couple bowls, going to the shire, smoking a couple bowls, buying alcohol, getting drunk, and alot of nothing good, i shouldnt be doing this, i fucking shouldnt, but i just let myself fuck up all the time. I DONT WANT TO. but i always give in. FUCK, i hate how i do that. chassis dumped me awhile ago, but that was mostly my fault, i fucked up once again. Some people think that im strong when it comes to relationships and friendships and lots of shit, im not, i just hide it until im alone, thats when you will see me in my worst times ever. I dont like to put my pain, and sadness onto anyone else because they have enough to worry about. I made things up with jenn, i called her and talked to her about lots of things. mainly things about me and chassis, jenn was so pissed at me, and who could blame her, i would be so pissed at me too, i totally fucked up, and i should have treated her the way i want to treat chassis, i have totally changed for the better in relationship wise, but in personal life, im still fucked, i am drinking and smoking way too much. FUCK!, oh well.ill get over it soon. Last night was fun, i cleaned my room, worked in the yard, got a ride to borders, finished off my 1/5th of parrot bay, got drunk, baught the strokes - room on fire, i love that cd, also i baught 2002 warped tour, meant to get 2003, but i was drunk, lol. Waited for dj and alex to pick me up, we smoked with kaimana, and then tried to buy a bottle at kta, some store walker saw us asking a guy in the store to buy for us, so he told us to leave. we, smoked again, then went to borders and hung out with friends, left, smoked, went to wendys parking lot, hung out with same friends, megan kept asking me to buy her alcohol, i tried reaaly hard but got none. im sorry, ask me next week, i will have some definetly. brias car got keyed, that sux, im really sorry. i hope u didnt get into trouble. anyway today , i did homework, and i think soon i will go to joes house in the pool, or go with alex and dj, and go do other stuff, stuff i shouldn do. Yes this is what i have been up to, bye bye.