okay. deep breath.
2005 is over. and has been over for.. several days now.
it was the worst year of my entire life. and i basically became a slave to work for a good chunk of the year. so if i wasnt social this year. especially after may. its because of stress anxiety and not knowing exactly what the fuck i am supposed to do right now.
and i apologize for being really reclusive.
but thats what i do when i fall under anxiety anymore.
i also realized that anxiety attacks give me cold sores. isnt that strange?
so in this new year of 2006. i would like to break out of my solitude and restart with everyone that i just.. never talked to.. not because i didnt care about them. or because i was "like, totally wrapped up in pointless life" but because i was just a disaster. and whenever i open my mouth tears are in my eyes.
i would also like to get back down to my old weight. that would be nice.
i dont even feel like eating. like ever.
except for hershey's kisses. YUMMY AS HELL.
i have learned alot this year. especially how to lean on myself and be the strongest person in the room.
and dammit. that is really hard to do. really really really fucking hard.
and now im okay. its going to be okay. the end.
it was the worst year of my entire life. and i basically became a slave to work for a good chunk of the year. so if i wasnt social this year. especially after may. its because of stress anxiety and not knowing exactly what the fuck i am supposed to do right now.
and i apologize for being really reclusive.
but thats what i do when i fall under anxiety anymore.
i also realized that anxiety attacks give me cold sores. isnt that strange?
so in this new year of 2006. i would like to break out of my solitude and restart with everyone that i just.. never talked to.. not because i didnt care about them. or because i was "like, totally wrapped up in pointless life" but because i was just a disaster. and whenever i open my mouth tears are in my eyes.
i would also like to get back down to my old weight. that would be nice.
i dont even feel like eating. like ever.
except for hershey's kisses. YUMMY AS HELL.
i have learned alot this year. especially how to lean on myself and be the strongest person in the room.
and dammit. that is really hard to do. really really really fucking hard.
and now im okay. its going to be okay. the end.