Naruto ; 04:00 ; Nobody's Lost (but nobody wins)
Theme: 4:00 / Improved luck or victory over a specific set of deterring circumstances
Title: Nobody's Lost (but nobody wins)
Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: NejiYuyaHina with an emphasis on the the YuyaHina
Category: Romantic
Rating: PG13/R, if you're gonna be real conservative about it.
Warnings: Language, references to certain body parts & actions people might find offensive (i.e., abortion).
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Summary: RL AU. Tayuya's mother disappoints her once again.
She looked like painting, in Hinata’s humble opinion, sitting there with her knees drawn up and a cigarette dangling from her fingers, the smoke tendrils reaching for heaven. The light from the moon pressed against her profile, lighting her features up gently. She wasn’t lovely, not in so many words. She was solid, and more alive and sizzling with existence than anyone Hinata had ever known in her life.
The mirror reflected an inverted number: four.
Her toes wriggled underneath the blanket, and she was sweating. It was a hot summer night, hot from the humidity, hot from the proximity of body to body, but Hinata couldn’t throw off the covers. She was naked, and outside the heat rose off the blacktop like a wave. You could see it quite visible from where Tayuya was perched on the window seat, coming off the cars like spirits of the dead.
Hinata watched the woman, this estranged woman with too much contained violence, and she wondered.
Wondered where she went at night when she got those phone calls. She’d promised, promised, that she was no damn whore, in that same voice that she’d told Hinata that her mother dead.
Wondered how her mother had died. Tayuya had been silent after the question had been brought up, and she didn’t look at Neji as she replied.
Wondered why Tayuya never spoke about the scar running like a railroad tracks across her belly, even when Hinata ran her fingers over it. She never even flinched, just pretended it was another stretch of skin.
“Tell me,” Hinata said, her voice raw. “Tell me about your mother?”
Tayuya’s eyes were shadowed as she turned to face her and the bed, the moonlight lighting up the space around her, but she remained dark as sin. “Tell me about your fuckin’ mother.”
Hinata lay back down and focused her eyes on the ceiling. There were no cracks like in her old apartment, before when Tayuya had told her it was time to get out of this freakin’ pile of shit corner Hinata had been planting herself in for years. So she let her eyes settle on the dreamcatcher she’d hung on a single nail above the bed like some people hung a cross with the old Jesus Christ. It was a cheap replica, but the feathers were pretty and soft, and Hinata thought it looked mystic and mysterious hanging in the bedroom.
“My mother was very…she was…she was a smart woman. Always very smart. Smart enough to marry my father. Smart enough to…um…” She cleared her throat. “My mother was close with my aunt. Neji’s mother. They were…close. When Neji’s mother died…My mother always told me that anyone who’d hurt me couldn’t love me the way I’d need them to. That anyone who hurt me was putting me up as a shield against their insecurities, and that above all else, I would always be…just a shield.”
Tayuya’s breath was all in and out against the backdrop of the silence that filled the room then.
“So your mom was all white lace, huh? Not a fuckin’ surprise, I guess. Your dad gots himself more’n a trophy wife. She didn’t teach ya very well, though, did she?”
“Guess not.”
Tayuya reached around the open window and put the cigarette out against the outside brick, letting the stub fall fall fall against the sidewalk. Her feet were bare but she stepped hard against the floor. That was just her way.
“My mom was like a fuckin’ bird. It ain’t an insult, but it ain’t much of a compliment, neither. I dunno why she had me. She could’ve just aborted me, easy-peasy. Women’ve done it for years an’ years an’ years, right? I’ve fuckin’ done it. She didn’t, though. She had me inna nice, right hospital bed, an’ then she brought me home with all the rosy blankets an’ such, knowin’, fuckin’ knowin’ that she wouldn’t last forever. She couldn’t last forever. My father didn’t know that, of course, the stupid cocksucker.
“That dream lasted a coupla years. Then poof, like a fuckin’ wind spirit, she was gone. Packed an’ gone. I don’t think she could ever stand havin’ people love her, really. Havin’ people need her, want her. She needed that freedom t’breath, yanno?”
She stood in front of the mirror, completely naked but for the thin pair of white grandma panties barely clinging to her weak curves. Studying herself, fingers twitching as if needing another cigarette, but Hinata knew the box was empty now. She pushed her hair back, as his upset by her own image, and then licked her lips, wetting them, her tongue getting caught on the chapped places. She growled, she pulled at her breasts, pushing them up weakly and then letting them fall back down like sad balloons. A hand grabbed at her white crotch, a movement that should have been vulgar but just seemed desperate, in context.
Then she lifted her foot up and slammed it against the glass.
Hinata would have expected it all to fall to pieces immediately like in the movies, but instead a large crack appeared where her heal met its reflection, and a thud resounded through the walls. Tayuya’s mirror image looked surprised as well, and she kicked at it again and again and again until finally pieces began to fall and they cut into her foot and she began to bleed.
“My fuckin’ mother needed t’breath, but I’m fuckin’ chokin’ in this fuckin’ lake. DROWNIN’. Motherfuckin’ cocksuckin’ cunt, I ain’t got nothin’ I owe her. I ain’t got nothin’ I owe her!”
She was slamming the mirror’s frame against the wall, again again and the whole apartment seemed to shake.
Hinata felt a sharp piece of glass slice her foot, and she winced as she held Tayuya from behind, goosebumps from the sudden chill.
Tayuya wasn’t crying, just shaking, shaking violently. “I don’t owe her shit,” she whispered, like a promise, but Hinata shook her head, burrowing her face into the mane of red hair that smelt of acrid smoke.
“It’s…it’s not about owing, Tayuya. You know this…It…it’s about saying goodbye. You need to end things now, or else it’ll grow. Grow like a cancer. Tell your mother goodbye.
“And forgive her.”
Title: Nobody's Lost (but nobody wins)
Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: NejiYuyaHina with an emphasis on the the YuyaHina
Category: Romantic
Rating: PG13/R, if you're gonna be real conservative about it.
Warnings: Language, references to certain body parts & actions people might find offensive (i.e., abortion).
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Summary: RL AU. Tayuya's mother disappoints her once again.
She looked like painting, in Hinata’s humble opinion, sitting there with her knees drawn up and a cigarette dangling from her fingers, the smoke tendrils reaching for heaven. The light from the moon pressed against her profile, lighting her features up gently. She wasn’t lovely, not in so many words. She was solid, and more alive and sizzling with existence than anyone Hinata had ever known in her life.
The mirror reflected an inverted number: four.
Her toes wriggled underneath the blanket, and she was sweating. It was a hot summer night, hot from the humidity, hot from the proximity of body to body, but Hinata couldn’t throw off the covers. She was naked, and outside the heat rose off the blacktop like a wave. You could see it quite visible from where Tayuya was perched on the window seat, coming off the cars like spirits of the dead.
Hinata watched the woman, this estranged woman with too much contained violence, and she wondered.
Wondered where she went at night when she got those phone calls. She’d promised, promised, that she was no damn whore, in that same voice that she’d told Hinata that her mother dead.
Wondered how her mother had died. Tayuya had been silent after the question had been brought up, and she didn’t look at Neji as she replied.
Wondered why Tayuya never spoke about the scar running like a railroad tracks across her belly, even when Hinata ran her fingers over it. She never even flinched, just pretended it was another stretch of skin.
“Tell me,” Hinata said, her voice raw. “Tell me about your mother?”
Tayuya’s eyes were shadowed as she turned to face her and the bed, the moonlight lighting up the space around her, but she remained dark as sin. “Tell me about your fuckin’ mother.”
Hinata lay back down and focused her eyes on the ceiling. There were no cracks like in her old apartment, before when Tayuya had told her it was time to get out of this freakin’ pile of shit corner Hinata had been planting herself in for years. So she let her eyes settle on the dreamcatcher she’d hung on a single nail above the bed like some people hung a cross with the old Jesus Christ. It was a cheap replica, but the feathers were pretty and soft, and Hinata thought it looked mystic and mysterious hanging in the bedroom.
“My mother was very…she was…she was a smart woman. Always very smart. Smart enough to marry my father. Smart enough to…um…” She cleared her throat. “My mother was close with my aunt. Neji’s mother. They were…close. When Neji’s mother died…My mother always told me that anyone who’d hurt me couldn’t love me the way I’d need them to. That anyone who hurt me was putting me up as a shield against their insecurities, and that above all else, I would always be…just a shield.”
Tayuya’s breath was all in and out against the backdrop of the silence that filled the room then.
“So your mom was all white lace, huh? Not a fuckin’ surprise, I guess. Your dad gots himself more’n a trophy wife. She didn’t teach ya very well, though, did she?”
“Guess not.”
Tayuya reached around the open window and put the cigarette out against the outside brick, letting the stub fall fall fall against the sidewalk. Her feet were bare but she stepped hard against the floor. That was just her way.
“My mom was like a fuckin’ bird. It ain’t an insult, but it ain’t much of a compliment, neither. I dunno why she had me. She could’ve just aborted me, easy-peasy. Women’ve done it for years an’ years an’ years, right? I’ve fuckin’ done it. She didn’t, though. She had me inna nice, right hospital bed, an’ then she brought me home with all the rosy blankets an’ such, knowin’, fuckin’ knowin’ that she wouldn’t last forever. She couldn’t last forever. My father didn’t know that, of course, the stupid cocksucker.
“That dream lasted a coupla years. Then poof, like a fuckin’ wind spirit, she was gone. Packed an’ gone. I don’t think she could ever stand havin’ people love her, really. Havin’ people need her, want her. She needed that freedom t’breath, yanno?”
She stood in front of the mirror, completely naked but for the thin pair of white grandma panties barely clinging to her weak curves. Studying herself, fingers twitching as if needing another cigarette, but Hinata knew the box was empty now. She pushed her hair back, as his upset by her own image, and then licked her lips, wetting them, her tongue getting caught on the chapped places. She growled, she pulled at her breasts, pushing them up weakly and then letting them fall back down like sad balloons. A hand grabbed at her white crotch, a movement that should have been vulgar but just seemed desperate, in context.
Then she lifted her foot up and slammed it against the glass.
Hinata would have expected it all to fall to pieces immediately like in the movies, but instead a large crack appeared where her heal met its reflection, and a thud resounded through the walls. Tayuya’s mirror image looked surprised as well, and she kicked at it again and again and again until finally pieces began to fall and they cut into her foot and she began to bleed.
“My fuckin’ mother needed t’breath, but I’m fuckin’ chokin’ in this fuckin’ lake. DROWNIN’. Motherfuckin’ cocksuckin’ cunt, I ain’t got nothin’ I owe her. I ain’t got nothin’ I owe her!”
She was slamming the mirror’s frame against the wall, again again and the whole apartment seemed to shake.
Hinata felt a sharp piece of glass slice her foot, and she winced as she held Tayuya from behind, goosebumps from the sudden chill.
Tayuya wasn’t crying, just shaking, shaking violently. “I don’t owe her shit,” she whispered, like a promise, but Hinata shook her head, burrowing her face into the mane of red hair that smelt of acrid smoke.
“It’s…it’s not about owing, Tayuya. You know this…It…it’s about saying goodbye. You need to end things now, or else it’ll grow. Grow like a cancer. Tell your mother goodbye.
“And forgive her.”