Love me, please.
Title: Love me, please
Pairings: JeTi
Rating: PG15/NC17 (Hints of rape)
Disclaimer: It's fiction.
She exited the noisy, boisterous club in panic, feeling suffocated and uncomfortable from the heat of human bodies that were surrounding around her inside. She doesn’t understand why Hyoyeon will bring her here, why all of them - Yuri, Yoona, SooYoung and Hyoyeon will even dare to bring her to the club where people are squeezing people. It’s the most disgusting place ever in the world, where people drink, smoke, grind on each other and kisses each other. No, strangers. They don’t even know who they are hooking up with. The sight of it make her feels nauseous and a lump on her throat. She wants it to go away, she wants to go home, back to the silent and empty apartment where there is only her and her comforter, where she could hide under it safely and feel nothing, except warmth.
Not creepy, dirty and rough hands that try to leave its marks on her body.
She stumbled a few steps down the street, the fresh cold air hits her face and she felt a little alive, finally. The heat was gone and she felt her breath catching up. She inhaled hastily before leaning against the red brick wall, feeling it beating from the loud bass music from the club that was situated in the basement. She could still hear the faint music, smell the faint cigarette smell that is lingering from the once used butts on the floor. Tiredly, she closed her eyes shut and leaned her forehead against the wall, feeling the urge to gag and vomit whatever was in her stomach.
“Hey! No! Stop!”
Her ears perked up at the light, scared girly voice that filled the silent pathway.
“Stop! Please! Don’t do this to me!”
She felt her body tensed at the cries again and she breathed in raggedly, her palms clenching tightly into fists as she opened her eyes slowly.
There it was, a low, dirty rumble of laughter before a shout and a soft thud. She froze.
“Please, don’t”
The cries were cut off, she was sure of it because it was muffled. Images started to fill her mind of what had happened.
Dirty, rough hands roaming on her body.
Rough, big mouth that covered her lips.
Heavy weight that crashed on her.
The smell of cigarette and alcohol made everything worse.
“Tiff-”
Tiffany shouted loudly and struggled her way out of the light touch on her shoulder, flinching and running down the street as the crimson red and disgusting memories flashed through her head.
She had to run.
She had to get home as soon as possible.
She had to shower and scrub off the dirt that is on her body.
She felt dirty and filthy.
Filthy and unworthy.
Filthy and disgusting.
With a hard brush of the back of her hand on her cheeks to wipe away her tears that had escaped without her knowing, she pumped her legs harder and ran faster, unaware of her group of friends that are chasing after her behind, worried and more worries.
--
“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry.”
Hyoyeon apologized for the umpteenth time to the brunette in front of her.
“We’re really sorry Sica, we didn’t mean too. She, she did not reject us when we suggest to go to the club, she was fine all the time until.. until someone got too close to her and she excused herself out of the club. We got worried so we went after her but when we called out to her, she, she just shout and ran away.”
Jessica stared emotionlessly as Yuri rambled away of what had happened just now, filling her in details as of why would she find Tiffany locked in her bathroom when she got home, with the group of them standing around the bathroom door not knowing what to do.
“I’m sorry Sica, we should have noticed it earlier, we - we shouldn’t even suggest to bring her to the club.”
SooYoung apologized once again and the four of them lowered their heads down in shame. Jessica had to laugh at that.
“It’s okay.”
Jessica muttered out softly before letting out a sigh. Four pairs of apologetic eyes stared up at her and Jessica gave them a soft smile before looking to the bathroom.
“How long has she been in there?”
Jessica asked as she took off her coat and placed it on the couch.
“Almost an hour.”
Hyoyeon replied softly and they went silent for a moment, allowing the sound of the water rushing filled in their ears before Jessica took in a deep breath.
“I’ll take care of it, thank you guys, for taking care of her while I’m away.”
“We never take care of her at all...”
Yoona mumbled guilty while Jessica merely smiled and ruffled her hair.
“You did, you guys did. I guessed something triggered her, she was usually fine. She’s able to mingle in the crowd for a period of time now or she wouldn’t agree to go with you guys.”
“But - “
Jessica shook her head and threw another glance at the closed door once again.
“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of her and don’t be guilty. You guys are just trying to make her better.”
The four of them exchanged glances before heaving out a sigh at the same time.
“Do you need us to stay and help?”
SooYoung suggested but Jessica shook her head.
“No, it’s fine. She will feel better and less guilty if I’m the only one here.”
The four of them nodded their heads slowly before throwing an apologetic gaze to the closed bathroom door.
“Please tell her that we are sorry? And remember to call us if you need help ok? We - we will be hanging around the neighborhood.”
SooYoung whispered to the older girl as the four of them walked towards the door. Jessica gave them a thumb up before turning her body over, strolling over to the closed bathroom. She heard the front door closed and she stopped in front of the bathroom door. Taking a deep breath, she called out.
“Tiffany?”
Nothing, but sound of water hitting against the bathroom tiles.
“Tiffany? It’s Jessica, it’s me.”
Jessica called out louder once again accompanied by a few knocks. She could feel everything that was going on behind the closed door stopped. The water sound ceased a few seconds later and Jessica could hear soft movements.
“Tiff? It’s me, open the door please?”
Jessica spoke out once again, deciding not to knock the door - a lesson she learnt after a year of coaxing Tiffany to come out of the bathroom every time this same incident happened. She had learnt that it’s going to take a lot of patience and cautious to pull Tiffany back towards to her whenever she has a relapse. She had learnt that if she wants Tiffany to recover from it, she had to give her time. Slow, they had to go slow.
“Jessi?”
It came out as a soft whisper, scared and fragile. It made Jessica felt sick in the stomach. It reminded her of that fateful day where she found Tiffany at the corner of an alley, curled up in a fetus position, crying soundlessly with her clothes torn to the stage where it barely covers her at all, and blood around her inner thighs.
It was sick and haunting. The images of Tiffany going ballistic when she approached her, how the younger girl screamed in the middle of night whenever the disgusting memory replayed in her mind, how Tiffany would then cry, run to the bathroom, turn on the shower and start rubbing her whole body hardly, mumbling about being dirty and wanting to wash everything away.
It never fails to take Jessica a lot of effort to convince that Tiffany is clean to get her out and often, when the younger girl was dry and ‘clean’, her skin would be bright red or starting to peel from the harsh actions.
The first phase of receiving therapy was the hardest, because no matter how slow the therapist and Tiffany decided to go, it was never slow enough for the victim. Jessica had often find herself chasing after the younger girl halfway during the treatment and later, find herself sitting quietly opposite Tiffany on the bed.
“Jessi? Is that you?”
Jessica smiled a little when Tiffany spoke out again, her voice louder, although still careful.
“It’s me, Tiff. I’m home.”
She heard the shower being turned off and a few seconds later, she saw Tiffany’s head peeking out of the crack of the door that was opened slowly.
“Hey baby.”
She watched as Tiffany’s eyes turned from careful to relieve, from relieved to happy before the door was flung open and Tiffany flew into her embrace.
“Jessi...”
Tiffany whispered lightly and buried her face against Jessica’s neck. Wrapping her arms around the slightly wet body, Jessica couldn’t help but smile at the realization that Tiffany was only having a towel wrapped around her body.
She felt relieved. Because if Tiffany is able to step out of the bathroom with a towel around her body only, it means Tiffany’s doing great, she’s recovered. Whatever had happened had only managed to push her back to her ‘normal’ habit of washing herself. She hugged Tiffany tighter before planting a kiss on the girl’s head.
“I miss you.”
Tiffany whispered once again and Jessica felt arms tightened around her.
“I’m here, it’s okay now.”
Jessica pulled the younger girl away slightly before smiling at Tiffany. Tiffany gave a shy smile before frowning and lowered her head when she remembered what had actually just happened.
“Jessi... I - I didn’t mean it... the girls...”
“It’s alright, they know, they are fine.”
Jessica lifted a hand before placing it on top of Tiffany’s head, smoothing the wet locks of hair before pulling the girl away to their bedroom.
“I’m sorry...”
Tiffany mumbled softly and stood rooted to the ground, still not daring to look up.
“And what are you sorry for?”
Jessica turned around and tilted her head to peek at Tiffany’s face. Tiffany was looking around the floor, eyes wide and pitiful with a small pout. Jessica couldn’t help but to steal a kiss from her.
“You didn’t flinch, you’re doing great so don’t be sorry.”
Jessica stated once she steal another peck. She would never tell any others how relieved she felt when Tiffany had finally stopped flinching whenever she get near to her, when Tiffany finally stopped tensing when she touched her and when Tiffany finally never avoid when she kisses her.
It took a whole half year for Tiffany to get used to Jessica again, to accept Jessica back in her life again when she realized that Jessica is never going to hurt her ever. It was only three months ago that she’s able to allow Jessica to be near her and touch her.
It was heartbreaking and heart aching for Jessica at first, seeing how the love of her life shun her like she was going to hurt her and how she was being view as a stranger in Tiffany’s eyes. It was difficult to watch how Tiffany undergoes all these trauma and there’s nothing she could do, not even how many promises or sweet talking that she had said worked, but she wasn’t going to give up. She will never give up on Tiffany. She loves the girl too much.
Partly, also, she felt that it’s her fault for whatever had happened to Tiffany.
If only she’s there early. Nothing would have happen.
“Come on, let’s get you some clothes or you will be sick.”
Jessica gave Tiffany a loving smile before pulling her to their bedroom.
---
“Jess?”
Jessica jerked a little at the voice, wondering if it was from her dream or reality that Tiffany was calling her.
“Jessi!”
It was a harsh whisper and it sounded so much like Tiffany was calling for help. She jolted up in shocked and sat up in panic before turning around to search for Tiffany.
“Tiffany?!”
“I’m hungry and cold.”
Tiffany sat up slowly from the bed before switching on the night light, revealing Jessica’s panic form and her own sleepy appearance.
“Jessi?”
Tiffany leaned forward to the anxious looking girl before reaching out to hold Jessica’s hand. She watched as Jessica relaxed her body obviously before slumping tiredly. It then struck Tiffany how hard had it really been for the older girl once again. She felt guilty and sorry.
She felt worthless.
Jessica shouldn’t have stick with her. Jessica should have leave. She was a dirty and tainted person.
She doesn’t deserve Jessica at all. She should have persisted in asking Jessica to leave, she deserve nothing anyway. She shouldn’t have drag Jessica down into this hell hole with her.
Jessica shouldn’t suffer because of her.
Jessica shouldn’t love her at all.
“You’re hungry? Shall I make some milk for you? Hm?”
Jessica gave Tiffany’s hand a tight squeeze before leaning forward to plant a kiss on her forehead. However, Tiffany turned her head away from the gesture, earning a curious look from Jessica.
“Tiff?”
Tiffany swallowed the lump in her throat before closing her eyes tightly, trying to prevent the tears from escaping.
“I’m sorry.”
Tiffany whispered out hoarsely, making Jessica more confused than ever.
“Tiff? What’s wrong? Why are you saying sorry?”
“I - we, we shouldn - I shouldn’t...”
Tiffany tried to speak but failed terribly when she realized she couldn’t bring her heart to ask Jessica to leave her. She loves the girl, she still love her alot and she was really grateful to have her. Call her selfish but without Jessica, she knew she couldn’t recover so fast. It’s because of Jessica. She feels safe when Jessica’s with her, she feels secure when she knows Jessica will always be there for her. She feels wanted, Jessica makes her feel wanted and loved even after what had happened.
“No.”
Jessica’s voice was angry and it startled her greatly. She whipped her head back to Jessica with a pair of frightened eyes. Jessica had never been angry with her.
“No, whatever you are trying to tell me, it’s impossible. I will never leave you.”
Tiffany was taken aback. How would Jessica know what she was trying to say?
“How did you -”
Jessica let out a sad smile before shaking her head.
“I know you Tiff, I know what you’re trying to do. You always avoid me whenever you want me to leave.”
Jessica mumbled out softly. She knew the girl’s action too clearly. It had happened before, a couple of times when Tiffany was still on her way of recovery. The younger girl will avoid her and push her away, telling her that she’s dirty and disgusting and Jessica deserved someone better. She remembered how she would then coax Tiffany into telling where Tiffany feels that she’s tainted and dirty, and how she would keep kissing her until Tiffany could only feel her and her lips only.
“But I-”
“I love you.”
Jessica cuts her off before crawling towards Tiffany.
“I love you and I will always love you.”
Jessica whispered before leaning down to capture Tiffany’s lips and pulled the younger girl onto her laps.
“I will never leave you so please, stop asking me to leave and keep thinking that you’re not worth of my love? Please?”
Tiffany let her tears run down freely to her cheeks as she hugged the older girl tighter, mumbling her apologies over and over again, telling Jessica to let her do so, so she could feel better and it’s the least she could do right now, being sorry and guilty for making Jessica suffer for her and promises to get all better again.
Jessica could only shake her head before planting kisses on Tiffany’s cheek after every apology was heard.
“Just love me. Just love me and everything will be worth it.”
Jessica whispered to Tiffany when the latter has calmed down from her cries.
“I love you.”
It came out in between sobs and hiccups and Jessica had to chuckle at how cute, yet loving and sincere it sounds.
“I love you too.”
A kiss was given to Tiffany to seal the deal they had.
---
An hour of crying, kissing and sharing a cup of milk later, Jessica found herself staring at the peaceful sleeping face in front of her. She smiled and scooted forward, pulling the girl closer to her embrace before kissing her luscious lips once again.
“I love you Tiffany.”
---
Four hours later, Tiffany found herself giggling over the sleeping Jessica as she hovered on top of the latter, planting kisses all over the face, trying to wake Jessica up for breakfast since the latter would not even budge after fifteen minutes of calling and pushing.
“Wakey!”
Another round of kisses and Tiffany yelped when Jessica suddenly flipped their position and buried her head in the crook of Tiffany’s neck.
“No!”
Tiffany cackled up when she felt Jessica blowing raspberry on her neck, she squirmed and laughed out loudly under Jessica’s body. She tensed when she felt Jessica kissing her pulse point and sucked in a breath.
“Sorry, I -”
Sensing the change in Tiffany, Jessica lifted her head up and apologized immediately but was cut off when Tiffany pulled her down for a kiss.
“Love me, please.”
Jessica let out a smile in their kisses before lowering her lips down to Tiffany’s neck.
“I will, I will love you slowly so just stay with me, okay?”
Tiffany nodded her head slightly and grinned when Jessica threw the comforter over their body, covering them underneath the warmth of soft, white clouds.
A/N: I don't know what to say about this piece. It just came to my mind and I feel like writing it out. So hope you will enjoy? It seems a little senseless though. Never really proofread so pardon for any mistake found!
Pairings: JeTi
Rating: PG15/NC17 (Hints of rape)
Disclaimer: It's fiction.
She exited the noisy, boisterous club in panic, feeling suffocated and uncomfortable from the heat of human bodies that were surrounding around her inside. She doesn’t understand why Hyoyeon will bring her here, why all of them - Yuri, Yoona, SooYoung and Hyoyeon will even dare to bring her to the club where people are squeezing people. It’s the most disgusting place ever in the world, where people drink, smoke, grind on each other and kisses each other. No, strangers. They don’t even know who they are hooking up with. The sight of it make her feels nauseous and a lump on her throat. She wants it to go away, she wants to go home, back to the silent and empty apartment where there is only her and her comforter, where she could hide under it safely and feel nothing, except warmth.
Not creepy, dirty and rough hands that try to leave its marks on her body.
She stumbled a few steps down the street, the fresh cold air hits her face and she felt a little alive, finally. The heat was gone and she felt her breath catching up. She inhaled hastily before leaning against the red brick wall, feeling it beating from the loud bass music from the club that was situated in the basement. She could still hear the faint music, smell the faint cigarette smell that is lingering from the once used butts on the floor. Tiredly, she closed her eyes shut and leaned her forehead against the wall, feeling the urge to gag and vomit whatever was in her stomach.
“Hey! No! Stop!”
Her ears perked up at the light, scared girly voice that filled the silent pathway.
“Stop! Please! Don’t do this to me!”
She felt her body tensed at the cries again and she breathed in raggedly, her palms clenching tightly into fists as she opened her eyes slowly.
There it was, a low, dirty rumble of laughter before a shout and a soft thud. She froze.
“Please, don’t”
The cries were cut off, she was sure of it because it was muffled. Images started to fill her mind of what had happened.
Dirty, rough hands roaming on her body.
Rough, big mouth that covered her lips.
Heavy weight that crashed on her.
The smell of cigarette and alcohol made everything worse.
“Tiff-”
Tiffany shouted loudly and struggled her way out of the light touch on her shoulder, flinching and running down the street as the crimson red and disgusting memories flashed through her head.
She had to run.
She had to get home as soon as possible.
She had to shower and scrub off the dirt that is on her body.
She felt dirty and filthy.
Filthy and unworthy.
Filthy and disgusting.
With a hard brush of the back of her hand on her cheeks to wipe away her tears that had escaped without her knowing, she pumped her legs harder and ran faster, unaware of her group of friends that are chasing after her behind, worried and more worries.
--
“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry.”
Hyoyeon apologized for the umpteenth time to the brunette in front of her.
“We’re really sorry Sica, we didn’t mean too. She, she did not reject us when we suggest to go to the club, she was fine all the time until.. until someone got too close to her and she excused herself out of the club. We got worried so we went after her but when we called out to her, she, she just shout and ran away.”
Jessica stared emotionlessly as Yuri rambled away of what had happened just now, filling her in details as of why would she find Tiffany locked in her bathroom when she got home, with the group of them standing around the bathroom door not knowing what to do.
“I’m sorry Sica, we should have noticed it earlier, we - we shouldn’t even suggest to bring her to the club.”
SooYoung apologized once again and the four of them lowered their heads down in shame. Jessica had to laugh at that.
“It’s okay.”
Jessica muttered out softly before letting out a sigh. Four pairs of apologetic eyes stared up at her and Jessica gave them a soft smile before looking to the bathroom.
“How long has she been in there?”
Jessica asked as she took off her coat and placed it on the couch.
“Almost an hour.”
Hyoyeon replied softly and they went silent for a moment, allowing the sound of the water rushing filled in their ears before Jessica took in a deep breath.
“I’ll take care of it, thank you guys, for taking care of her while I’m away.”
“We never take care of her at all...”
Yoona mumbled guilty while Jessica merely smiled and ruffled her hair.
“You did, you guys did. I guessed something triggered her, she was usually fine. She’s able to mingle in the crowd for a period of time now or she wouldn’t agree to go with you guys.”
“But - “
Jessica shook her head and threw another glance at the closed door once again.
“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of her and don’t be guilty. You guys are just trying to make her better.”
The four of them exchanged glances before heaving out a sigh at the same time.
“Do you need us to stay and help?”
SooYoung suggested but Jessica shook her head.
“No, it’s fine. She will feel better and less guilty if I’m the only one here.”
The four of them nodded their heads slowly before throwing an apologetic gaze to the closed bathroom door.
“Please tell her that we are sorry? And remember to call us if you need help ok? We - we will be hanging around the neighborhood.”
SooYoung whispered to the older girl as the four of them walked towards the door. Jessica gave them a thumb up before turning her body over, strolling over to the closed bathroom. She heard the front door closed and she stopped in front of the bathroom door. Taking a deep breath, she called out.
“Tiffany?”
Nothing, but sound of water hitting against the bathroom tiles.
“Tiffany? It’s Jessica, it’s me.”
Jessica called out louder once again accompanied by a few knocks. She could feel everything that was going on behind the closed door stopped. The water sound ceased a few seconds later and Jessica could hear soft movements.
“Tiff? It’s me, open the door please?”
Jessica spoke out once again, deciding not to knock the door - a lesson she learnt after a year of coaxing Tiffany to come out of the bathroom every time this same incident happened. She had learnt that it’s going to take a lot of patience and cautious to pull Tiffany back towards to her whenever she has a relapse. She had learnt that if she wants Tiffany to recover from it, she had to give her time. Slow, they had to go slow.
“Jessi?”
It came out as a soft whisper, scared and fragile. It made Jessica felt sick in the stomach. It reminded her of that fateful day where she found Tiffany at the corner of an alley, curled up in a fetus position, crying soundlessly with her clothes torn to the stage where it barely covers her at all, and blood around her inner thighs.
It was sick and haunting. The images of Tiffany going ballistic when she approached her, how the younger girl screamed in the middle of night whenever the disgusting memory replayed in her mind, how Tiffany would then cry, run to the bathroom, turn on the shower and start rubbing her whole body hardly, mumbling about being dirty and wanting to wash everything away.
It never fails to take Jessica a lot of effort to convince that Tiffany is clean to get her out and often, when the younger girl was dry and ‘clean’, her skin would be bright red or starting to peel from the harsh actions.
The first phase of receiving therapy was the hardest, because no matter how slow the therapist and Tiffany decided to go, it was never slow enough for the victim. Jessica had often find herself chasing after the younger girl halfway during the treatment and later, find herself sitting quietly opposite Tiffany on the bed.
“Jessi? Is that you?”
Jessica smiled a little when Tiffany spoke out again, her voice louder, although still careful.
“It’s me, Tiff. I’m home.”
She heard the shower being turned off and a few seconds later, she saw Tiffany’s head peeking out of the crack of the door that was opened slowly.
“Hey baby.”
She watched as Tiffany’s eyes turned from careful to relieve, from relieved to happy before the door was flung open and Tiffany flew into her embrace.
“Jessi...”
Tiffany whispered lightly and buried her face against Jessica’s neck. Wrapping her arms around the slightly wet body, Jessica couldn’t help but smile at the realization that Tiffany was only having a towel wrapped around her body.
She felt relieved. Because if Tiffany is able to step out of the bathroom with a towel around her body only, it means Tiffany’s doing great, she’s recovered. Whatever had happened had only managed to push her back to her ‘normal’ habit of washing herself. She hugged Tiffany tighter before planting a kiss on the girl’s head.
“I miss you.”
Tiffany whispered once again and Jessica felt arms tightened around her.
“I’m here, it’s okay now.”
Jessica pulled the younger girl away slightly before smiling at Tiffany. Tiffany gave a shy smile before frowning and lowered her head when she remembered what had actually just happened.
“Jessi... I - I didn’t mean it... the girls...”
“It’s alright, they know, they are fine.”
Jessica lifted a hand before placing it on top of Tiffany’s head, smoothing the wet locks of hair before pulling the girl away to their bedroom.
“I’m sorry...”
Tiffany mumbled softly and stood rooted to the ground, still not daring to look up.
“And what are you sorry for?”
Jessica turned around and tilted her head to peek at Tiffany’s face. Tiffany was looking around the floor, eyes wide and pitiful with a small pout. Jessica couldn’t help but to steal a kiss from her.
“You didn’t flinch, you’re doing great so don’t be sorry.”
Jessica stated once she steal another peck. She would never tell any others how relieved she felt when Tiffany had finally stopped flinching whenever she get near to her, when Tiffany finally stopped tensing when she touched her and when Tiffany finally never avoid when she kisses her.
It took a whole half year for Tiffany to get used to Jessica again, to accept Jessica back in her life again when she realized that Jessica is never going to hurt her ever. It was only three months ago that she’s able to allow Jessica to be near her and touch her.
It was heartbreaking and heart aching for Jessica at first, seeing how the love of her life shun her like she was going to hurt her and how she was being view as a stranger in Tiffany’s eyes. It was difficult to watch how Tiffany undergoes all these trauma and there’s nothing she could do, not even how many promises or sweet talking that she had said worked, but she wasn’t going to give up. She will never give up on Tiffany. She loves the girl too much.
Partly, also, she felt that it’s her fault for whatever had happened to Tiffany.
If only she’s there early. Nothing would have happen.
“Come on, let’s get you some clothes or you will be sick.”
Jessica gave Tiffany a loving smile before pulling her to their bedroom.
---
“Jess?”
Jessica jerked a little at the voice, wondering if it was from her dream or reality that Tiffany was calling her.
“Jessi!”
It was a harsh whisper and it sounded so much like Tiffany was calling for help. She jolted up in shocked and sat up in panic before turning around to search for Tiffany.
“Tiffany?!”
“I’m hungry and cold.”
Tiffany sat up slowly from the bed before switching on the night light, revealing Jessica’s panic form and her own sleepy appearance.
“Jessi?”
Tiffany leaned forward to the anxious looking girl before reaching out to hold Jessica’s hand. She watched as Jessica relaxed her body obviously before slumping tiredly. It then struck Tiffany how hard had it really been for the older girl once again. She felt guilty and sorry.
She felt worthless.
Jessica shouldn’t have stick with her. Jessica should have leave. She was a dirty and tainted person.
She doesn’t deserve Jessica at all. She should have persisted in asking Jessica to leave, she deserve nothing anyway. She shouldn’t have drag Jessica down into this hell hole with her.
Jessica shouldn’t suffer because of her.
Jessica shouldn’t love her at all.
“You’re hungry? Shall I make some milk for you? Hm?”
Jessica gave Tiffany’s hand a tight squeeze before leaning forward to plant a kiss on her forehead. However, Tiffany turned her head away from the gesture, earning a curious look from Jessica.
“Tiff?”
Tiffany swallowed the lump in her throat before closing her eyes tightly, trying to prevent the tears from escaping.
“I’m sorry.”
Tiffany whispered out hoarsely, making Jessica more confused than ever.
“Tiff? What’s wrong? Why are you saying sorry?”
“I - we, we shouldn - I shouldn’t...”
Tiffany tried to speak but failed terribly when she realized she couldn’t bring her heart to ask Jessica to leave her. She loves the girl, she still love her alot and she was really grateful to have her. Call her selfish but without Jessica, she knew she couldn’t recover so fast. It’s because of Jessica. She feels safe when Jessica’s with her, she feels secure when she knows Jessica will always be there for her. She feels wanted, Jessica makes her feel wanted and loved even after what had happened.
“No.”
Jessica’s voice was angry and it startled her greatly. She whipped her head back to Jessica with a pair of frightened eyes. Jessica had never been angry with her.
“No, whatever you are trying to tell me, it’s impossible. I will never leave you.”
Tiffany was taken aback. How would Jessica know what she was trying to say?
“How did you -”
Jessica let out a sad smile before shaking her head.
“I know you Tiff, I know what you’re trying to do. You always avoid me whenever you want me to leave.”
Jessica mumbled out softly. She knew the girl’s action too clearly. It had happened before, a couple of times when Tiffany was still on her way of recovery. The younger girl will avoid her and push her away, telling her that she’s dirty and disgusting and Jessica deserved someone better. She remembered how she would then coax Tiffany into telling where Tiffany feels that she’s tainted and dirty, and how she would keep kissing her until Tiffany could only feel her and her lips only.
“But I-”
“I love you.”
Jessica cuts her off before crawling towards Tiffany.
“I love you and I will always love you.”
Jessica whispered before leaning down to capture Tiffany’s lips and pulled the younger girl onto her laps.
“I will never leave you so please, stop asking me to leave and keep thinking that you’re not worth of my love? Please?”
Tiffany let her tears run down freely to her cheeks as she hugged the older girl tighter, mumbling her apologies over and over again, telling Jessica to let her do so, so she could feel better and it’s the least she could do right now, being sorry and guilty for making Jessica suffer for her and promises to get all better again.
Jessica could only shake her head before planting kisses on Tiffany’s cheek after every apology was heard.
“Just love me. Just love me and everything will be worth it.”
Jessica whispered to Tiffany when the latter has calmed down from her cries.
“I love you.”
It came out in between sobs and hiccups and Jessica had to chuckle at how cute, yet loving and sincere it sounds.
“I love you too.”
A kiss was given to Tiffany to seal the deal they had.
---
An hour of crying, kissing and sharing a cup of milk later, Jessica found herself staring at the peaceful sleeping face in front of her. She smiled and scooted forward, pulling the girl closer to her embrace before kissing her luscious lips once again.
“I love you Tiffany.”
---
Four hours later, Tiffany found herself giggling over the sleeping Jessica as she hovered on top of the latter, planting kisses all over the face, trying to wake Jessica up for breakfast since the latter would not even budge after fifteen minutes of calling and pushing.
“Wakey!”
Another round of kisses and Tiffany yelped when Jessica suddenly flipped their position and buried her head in the crook of Tiffany’s neck.
“No!”
Tiffany cackled up when she felt Jessica blowing raspberry on her neck, she squirmed and laughed out loudly under Jessica’s body. She tensed when she felt Jessica kissing her pulse point and sucked in a breath.
“Sorry, I -”
Sensing the change in Tiffany, Jessica lifted her head up and apologized immediately but was cut off when Tiffany pulled her down for a kiss.
“Love me, please.”
Jessica let out a smile in their kisses before lowering her lips down to Tiffany’s neck.
“I will, I will love you slowly so just stay with me, okay?”
Tiffany nodded her head slightly and grinned when Jessica threw the comforter over their body, covering them underneath the warmth of soft, white clouds.
A/N: I don't know what to say about this piece. It just came to my mind and I feel like writing it out. So hope you will enjoy? It seems a little senseless though. Never really proofread so pardon for any mistake found!