It's been awhile.
I've never really been a regular here, more along the lines of typing when I'm in need of comfort and trying to give comfort the best that I can when I'm able to access the net, but... this year I've been feeling the need for updates in all my life.
It's been a whole year and four months since I've last been triggered, not to say that the urge and the need are not there, but the fact that I've been channel'n it in a different way then what I normally did. This has been the longest for me since this whole thing started almost 15 years ago. A year and some change, and still going strong. I've come to offer my advice, comfort, help and above all my support to all of you when you need it.
I think the best source I have to work with is my art, I moved out of that dark place that I was at and moved into an apartment all by myself where I wasn't allowed to really have those bad days anymore. Not unless I wanted to not function and pay rent, so I pushed myself to be more. More this and less depressive. I forced all those emotions into art, poems and finally a book that I'm trying to get published.
I guess, I've finally got something happy in my life that is really all about me. No great loves to speak of, but then again I always just loved love as a way to hurt myself, you know? I always went for the MR Wrong who wouldn't help me, but I'm finally at a place where I created a happiness from inside verses trying to get someone to do it for me.
That's about it.
It's been a whole year and four months since I've last been triggered, not to say that the urge and the need are not there, but the fact that I've been channel'n it in a different way then what I normally did. This has been the longest for me since this whole thing started almost 15 years ago. A year and some change, and still going strong. I've come to offer my advice, comfort, help and above all my support to all of you when you need it.
I think the best source I have to work with is my art, I moved out of that dark place that I was at and moved into an apartment all by myself where I wasn't allowed to really have those bad days anymore. Not unless I wanted to not function and pay rent, so I pushed myself to be more. More this and less depressive. I forced all those emotions into art, poems and finally a book that I'm trying to get published.
I guess, I've finally got something happy in my life that is really all about me. No great loves to speak of, but then again I always just loved love as a way to hurt myself, you know? I always went for the MR Wrong who wouldn't help me, but I'm finally at a place where I created a happiness from inside verses trying to get someone to do it for me.
That's about it.