Time to buy some seasonal sweaters
I have been thinking a lot about my future lately, and have come to a startling realization. I am enjoying the crap out of teaching. Sure, I have bad days. Sometimes I think I am doing a terrible job. But most days, teaching gives me a certain sense of centeredness. It's not like I wake up every morning and go "GOLLY GEE WHIZ HURRAY ANOTHER DAY OF TEACHING!!" That's not it at all. Teaching is often a frustrating, mind-boggling, bizarre job. But I don't ever wake up and curse the sun for rising so I have to go to work either. Teaching is something that I do without thinking about it. It just happens.
Most days I think my kids like me, and they seem to be learning. Granted, I'm not their only teacher, but let me feel good about myself and take a little credit please. Kids are easy to love, even when they are being little bastards. And kids are quick to love other people, which is more than I can say about 99.9% of adults. I'm amazed by how bright children are, and how easily they can learn new things. They are simultaneously insane and creative and messy and honest and adorable and terrible and did I mention insane?
I did not see this coming, not in a million years, but I think when I get back to the States I may go back to school and get a degree in education. I'd like to teach ESL, because the results of ESL classes are so much more tangible than other subjects. Ideally, I would like to teach in the United States, but not to any particular first language. There are lots of good schools that teach ESL to classes of mixed first languages, and that's the kind of situation I'd like to get myself into. This would mean I'd have to live in a relatively diverse urban area, which is what I've always seen myself doing anyway.
I'm not sure if this is "it" yet. I don't know if this is the sign that I've been looking for regarding what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. We'll see if I get burned out on teaching before the year is up and if this is yet another fleeting idea, like all of the others. Still, I've been in Korea for three months now, which is apparently the point that most teachers here start to get worn down as the new-ness wears off. But I feel better now than ever: I feel settled in a good way, not bored. I'm developing real relationships with the people around me.
For the first time in a long time, I feel like I'm breathing at an even pace. My life isn't too wild or too boring. It just....is.
Most days I think my kids like me, and they seem to be learning. Granted, I'm not their only teacher, but let me feel good about myself and take a little credit please. Kids are easy to love, even when they are being little bastards. And kids are quick to love other people, which is more than I can say about 99.9% of adults. I'm amazed by how bright children are, and how easily they can learn new things. They are simultaneously insane and creative and messy and honest and adorable and terrible and did I mention insane?
I did not see this coming, not in a million years, but I think when I get back to the States I may go back to school and get a degree in education. I'd like to teach ESL, because the results of ESL classes are so much more tangible than other subjects. Ideally, I would like to teach in the United States, but not to any particular first language. There are lots of good schools that teach ESL to classes of mixed first languages, and that's the kind of situation I'd like to get myself into. This would mean I'd have to live in a relatively diverse urban area, which is what I've always seen myself doing anyway.
I'm not sure if this is "it" yet. I don't know if this is the sign that I've been looking for regarding what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. We'll see if I get burned out on teaching before the year is up and if this is yet another fleeting idea, like all of the others. Still, I've been in Korea for three months now, which is apparently the point that most teachers here start to get worn down as the new-ness wears off. But I feel better now than ever: I feel settled in a good way, not bored. I'm developing real relationships with the people around me.
For the first time in a long time, I feel like I'm breathing at an even pace. My life isn't too wild or too boring. It just....is.