SVJH #17: Whatever

[hellobrisvegas]

Yay, my very first SVJH book! It feels so different actually sitting down and attempting to recap a book. (Even one as thin as the SVJH books.) The TV episode recaps feel a bit like cheating. It's kinda like renting some Daniel Day-Lewis instead of reading The Crucible. Or Robert Redford instead of The Great Gatsby. Or Leo instead of Romeo and

Comments

[jedinic]

I now see I was missing absolutely NOTHING by not reading these books. Why are these people and why should we care?!

(That must have been so painful for you to recap!)

[hellobrisvegas]

Yeah, it was. I can't believe I once liked it enough to actually BUY it. Damn that persuasive Lacey!

[riotcalifornia]

Hi-five, fellow twenty-year-old! :D

Sorry, I tried to read the snark, then got way confused, since I've only read one Jr High book and as a result I have no idea who any of these people are. ;__; GOD DAMN IT, WHERE THE FUCK IS LILA

Oh, but the cover has hella ~attitude~.

[hellobrisvegas]

Go go twenty-year-olds! :)

I understand your confusion completely. I never read the Twins or Kids books, so any of the characters that didn't appear in the high school books are just lost on me. And you can forget about those Unicorn books. (Although I did reference Janet Howell in this recap, but that's just 'cause I'm awesome.)

[saffronlie]

I read this whole thing because it was hilariously snarky. My younger sister read these (and the age difference between her and I is about as much as between you and me, maybe you two should be friends) and I would pick them up and be SO CONFUSED at how non-Sweet Valley they seemed. Emails! Photographs on the cover and not "art"! Real teen issues (sort of)! So odd. But I loved your recap.

[kakeochi_umai]

And I'm sorry, Kristin, but not everyone's mother thinks they look beautiful no matter what.

This. Apparently the owner of the shop I recently started working in, not content with being a bitch to her staff and driving them insane, also tells customers that she's ashamed of her fat daughter and deliberately buys her clothes two sizes too small to shame her into losing weight. O_o

Thankfully, Lacey doesn't go on forever about how fucking dark they are.

That would be awesome. Like that scene in The Princess Diaries where the grandmother says "You look so...young!" and Mia says "Thanks...and you look so...clean!"

The part about Sonia telling boring modelling stories about herself the whole time is making me think of Tyra Banks (and Tyra apparently flakes on ANTM a lot too - apparently the reason Paulina got fired was because she called Tyra out on the fact that she kept being hours late for things like panel.) Please let Sonia be deranged too. Please?

[hellobrisvegas]

That mother who bought her daughter the too-small clothes should be shot, SHOT, I say!

I'm betting a lot of money that Sonia's deranged. That's probably why she left the Frells family in the first place, to get some court-appointed counselling...

[kakeochi_umai]

Yeah, we really feel for her daughter. I shuddered at the thought of having her as a mother just based on what it's like to work with her, but after hearing that...that poor girl.

I would like to see a fanfic in which Sonia says "Turkey pepperoni or real pork swine?"

[ohvelocitygirl]

Hilarious recap. I especially enjoyed the 'Whatever' count. I too felt like it was lacking in 'whatevers'. I remember reading these books and I think... it might have been pointed out like once in the history of SVJH that Lacey actually liked Gel but I could be wrong. I think what it really boiled down to was that he had a car. She was shallow and though she couldn't fill the Lila-shaped hole that SVJH caused me, she was fun most of the time.

[hellobrisvegas]

Even in that book where they broke up, Lacey only got back together with him because A) she didn't get Damon Ross, and B) 'cause he painted his car. I like that they almost seem to hate each other, though. It's bizarrely appealing.