As you know I masturbate daily to photos of you eating various kinds of specially prepared Fruit Baskets.
However, if I may quote the bard, and I may, "Big Dog Gotta Eat."
The bank is dry. I need new materials.
Please take a series of candid shots of you ingesting an array of exotic fruits, eaten as messily as possible.
To address another issue, I phoned your agent the other day and he said it would be great for the next season of Jones Town Mascara to feature a workplace romance. Since the crossover episode Doovies Comes On Jones Town Good Times Special was such a ratings bonanza, he suggested that I could be added as a semi-regular guest star on the provision that we work together, preferably with you as my boss.
This would be integral to facilitate the plot twist for Season 21 Episode 19: Jones Gets Mouth Fucked In A Stairwell At Work On The Boss' Dime.
As such, were you to become manager, it would be agreeable to both myself and my producers, that I should be hired.
Dear Husband, Upon your agent getting in touch with my agent, it has become apparent that my agent has not been doing his job properly. My agent, or 007 as he has always introduced himself to me, has always convinced me that he is suave, fantastic in bed - most notably the one your mother purchased for our wedding present - and above all else, elusive. The fact that your agent has been able to locate him, points out the fact that he actually is not elusive, and more just a middle age English man, who enjoys partaking in intercourse with barely legal blondes. Upon firing Mr. 007, he let it slip that he is in fact also YOUR agent. So not only has he been playing me, but also yourself, as he has made a point of advising me that you were also under the impression that he was elusive. And the fact that our mutual agent seemed to have been having many long and exhilarating conversations with himself (his description, not mine) leads me to believe that he may not be entirely stable. As my career is the most important thing in my life, as I'm sure yours is, I feel that the loss of my agent has been a blessing. Maybe you would like to consider terminating him also. Once your decision has been made, please advise me in writing and we can then discuss our silver screen career. Faithfully yours, Wife.
PS. In regards to Season 21 Episode 19 - That was actually titled "Doovies does Mexico while Jones jacks off" "Jones Gets Mouth Fucked In A Stairwell At Work On The Boss' Dime" was Season 21 Episode 11. For shame!
As you know I masturbate daily to photos of you eating various kinds of specially prepared Fruit Baskets.
However, if I may quote the bard, and I may, "Big Dog Gotta Eat."
The bank is dry. I need new materials.
Please take a series of candid shots of you ingesting an array of exotic fruits, eaten as messily as possible.
To address another issue, I phoned your agent the other day and he said it would be great for the next season of Jones Town Mascara to feature a workplace romance. Since the crossover episode Doovies Comes On Jones Town Good Times Special was such a ratings bonanza, he suggested that I could be added as a semi-regular guest star on the provision that we work together, preferably with you as my boss.
This would be integral to facilitate the plot twist for Season 21 Episode 19: Jones Gets Mouth Fucked In A Stairwell At Work On The Boss' Dime.
As such, were you to become manager, it would be agreeable to both myself and my producers, that I should be hired.
Happy Non-Specific Season Greeting.
Much Love,
Husband.
Reply
Upon your agent getting in touch with my agent, it has become apparent that my agent has not been doing his job properly.
My agent, or 007 as he has always introduced himself to me, has always convinced me that he is suave, fantastic in bed - most notably the one your mother purchased for our wedding present - and above all else, elusive.
The fact that your agent has been able to locate him, points out the fact that he actually is not elusive, and more just a middle age English man, who enjoys partaking in intercourse with barely legal blondes.
Upon firing Mr. 007, he let it slip that he is in fact also YOUR agent.
So not only has he been playing me, but also yourself, as he has made a point of advising me that you were also under the impression that he was elusive.
And the fact that our mutual agent seemed to have been having many long and exhilarating conversations with himself (his description, not mine) leads me to believe that he may not be entirely stable.
As my career is the most important thing in my life, as I'm sure yours is, I feel that the loss of my agent has been a blessing.
Maybe you would like to consider terminating him also.
Once your decision has been made, please advise me in writing and we can then discuss our silver screen career.
Faithfully yours,
Wife.
PS. In regards to Season 21 Episode 19 - That was actually titled "Doovies does Mexico while Jones jacks off"
"Jones Gets Mouth Fucked In A Stairwell At Work On The Boss' Dime" was Season 21 Episode 11. For shame!
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