To set the record firmly crooked
Over the last few weeks I've said things on-line in certain places that I know some people won't belive, I know I wouldn't if some of them were to say the things I've said, so to set the record at least firmly crooked here are some of the low point, again. Although I can laugh about the guns being pointed at me now. There are also some of the stupid things I've done while at work, various places.
Knives;
I've had a few people wave knives at me now, my ex, some Adlington inbreeds, once my brother pulled a machete on me. So when Julies ex pulls out a little stanley knife, I almost laughed.
Guns;
This is a good one. I was a contractor at a place in Warrington called Agrevo, who make animal feeds. Now if you are making this stuff and mix it 'wrong' you can end up with weapons of mass destruction. No really. So part of the license for this place is that the UN can send in a team at any time to check that nothing funny is going on. This involves a total shut down of activity at the plant. So there's me and the driver we're cutting up this huge, heavy empty tank of hazardous chemicals when a head is stuck round the door and a voice shouts at us telling us to stop what the hell we are doing as the UN are here, and we aren't allowed to do anything. We look at each other and go get a brew, I get my book out of the van and sit down for a read. After an hour the driver asks me to go and get some of the things off the top floor and put them in the van. So off I go up stairs, pick up the tool box, extension and other stuff left up there, I end up with a hammer balanced on top of the tool box. Walking down the stairs the hammer slips off the box and makes a loud noise as it hits the metal decking of the landing I'm on, next thing I know the door on the landing is kicked open and 2 guys dressed in black and pointing guns at me are standing there. Now the hole is only small, but I swear on my kids life you could of parked a bus in the barrel, sideways with room to spare. It filled my world. The moment only lasted 2-3 seconds, or a life time depending. Then the SO 19 guys lowered their guns and looked at me like I was a moron. They later got me a brew as recompense.
Stupid;
Interbrew, Preston;
Crawling along a pipe, 25 foot in the air checking that some drain holes are clear, on the way down I noticed that there is a nice shiny bit of pipe, remember this. Now I go and finish this horrid job and am crawling back along the pipe work, when out of the corner of my eye I see another man crawling along the pipe towards me, so I dodge out of the way, by rolling around the pipe a little, well that was the plan. I slid off, hanging there from the harness I'm wearing I think 'well at least the guy up there can pull me up' when about half a minute has passed and no head has come into view it dawns on me that I must of seen my reflection in the shiny section of pipe.
Ten minute later the guy I'm working with came down to see what I was up to. About 5 minutes later when he'd got his breath back he went and got me a ladder so I could get down. He swore himself to never tell anyone.
Leyland Trucks;
I've stopped the track for 45 minutes by leaving the chains on the rear end of a wagon at the end of that part of the track, the end was 4 feet in the air before anyone 'noticed'
I've set the place on fire. But that wasn't my fault.
Knives;
I've had a few people wave knives at me now, my ex, some Adlington inbreeds, once my brother pulled a machete on me. So when Julies ex pulls out a little stanley knife, I almost laughed.
Guns;
This is a good one. I was a contractor at a place in Warrington called Agrevo, who make animal feeds. Now if you are making this stuff and mix it 'wrong' you can end up with weapons of mass destruction. No really. So part of the license for this place is that the UN can send in a team at any time to check that nothing funny is going on. This involves a total shut down of activity at the plant. So there's me and the driver we're cutting up this huge, heavy empty tank of hazardous chemicals when a head is stuck round the door and a voice shouts at us telling us to stop what the hell we are doing as the UN are here, and we aren't allowed to do anything. We look at each other and go get a brew, I get my book out of the van and sit down for a read. After an hour the driver asks me to go and get some of the things off the top floor and put them in the van. So off I go up stairs, pick up the tool box, extension and other stuff left up there, I end up with a hammer balanced on top of the tool box. Walking down the stairs the hammer slips off the box and makes a loud noise as it hits the metal decking of the landing I'm on, next thing I know the door on the landing is kicked open and 2 guys dressed in black and pointing guns at me are standing there. Now the hole is only small, but I swear on my kids life you could of parked a bus in the barrel, sideways with room to spare. It filled my world. The moment only lasted 2-3 seconds, or a life time depending. Then the SO 19 guys lowered their guns and looked at me like I was a moron. They later got me a brew as recompense.
Stupid;
Interbrew, Preston;
Crawling along a pipe, 25 foot in the air checking that some drain holes are clear, on the way down I noticed that there is a nice shiny bit of pipe, remember this. Now I go and finish this horrid job and am crawling back along the pipe work, when out of the corner of my eye I see another man crawling along the pipe towards me, so I dodge out of the way, by rolling around the pipe a little, well that was the plan. I slid off, hanging there from the harness I'm wearing I think 'well at least the guy up there can pull me up' when about half a minute has passed and no head has come into view it dawns on me that I must of seen my reflection in the shiny section of pipe.
Ten minute later the guy I'm working with came down to see what I was up to. About 5 minutes later when he'd got his breath back he went and got me a ladder so I could get down. He swore himself to never tell anyone.
Leyland Trucks;
I've stopped the track for 45 minutes by leaving the chains on the rear end of a wagon at the end of that part of the track, the end was 4 feet in the air before anyone 'noticed'
I've set the place on fire. But that wasn't my fault.