(no subject)
hmmm..i feel really out of place. i was doing some livejournal hopping and came across a journal. i thought the girl was maybe 17ish turns out her birthday is 4-5-91. i'm 4 days older than her. she seemed so much older. i feel older than i really am. i feel like everyone around me is doing the sterotypical teen crap and making wrong decisions, following the crowd, dating 5 guys in one week. i wish i could find a group of people who are not afraid to be out of the ordinary and who actual have a little common sense. i mean i love the friends i have. i'm not really talking about most of them. but i just..i dunno. i dont feel right. i feel like i'm missing something. i need someone of fill that place. and i feel really stupid for feeling this way. i mean, i'm such a lucky person. i should NOT be complaining. but what can i say? i cant help it. i lost two very important people in my life recently. i wish i could get them back. one of them i will never ever have back and the other..well he doesnt seem too willing. and i dont want to get hurt again. he should just know i love him and he was an awesome friend..before things got fucked up. and what really sucks is the fact that i dont really know what happened. i miss you alot. but i guess i'll just have to keep ignoring it. cause i think your just over it, and in a way i am too. but i cant say i'd turn you away if you started talking to me again.
alright, enough of my saddness. NOW FOR HAPPY NEWS:
I MADE IT!!!!!!!!!
yessssss! i got the letter in the mail Friday. the forms and first deposit has to be in before March 31st so i've gotta get a move on. i'm going one of the August weeks. i'm so excitied. NEW YORK TWO TIMES IN ONE YEARRRRRRRRRRR. again. heh. i just hope some people from the studio are going in August. i've gotta find out. & maybe i'll find out when Ali is going..we used to be friends maybe if we go the same week we'll start talking more again? i dont know. i'm just so happy. i cant believe it. i feel..like i'm actually good at something.
i just got back from riding with my dad to the Hardees to see if the old cars were out tonight but they werent there. so we rode over to the Dariy Queen in Varina because they are there sometimes too but they werent..:( the lady working there said they should be coming out in a few weeks.
my dad is getting the new carpet and seat covers put in the Vett in like..two weeks. by this summer that car is gonna be so amazing. i wish i had an old car..i dont know which one i'd want because i just love them all..hmmm..oh i finished my West. Hem. project last night. wooooooooo.
i feel really weird. happy and sad. all rolled into one. i'm sappy. i'm had. which ever you prefer.
i take one one one cause you left me and
two two two for my family and
three three three for my heartache and
four four four for my headaches and
five five five for my lonely and
six six six for my sorrow and
seven seven for no tomorrow
♥
alright, enough of my saddness. NOW FOR HAPPY NEWS:
I MADE IT!!!!!!!!!
yessssss! i got the letter in the mail Friday. the forms and first deposit has to be in before March 31st so i've gotta get a move on. i'm going one of the August weeks. i'm so excitied. NEW YORK TWO TIMES IN ONE YEARRRRRRRRRRR. again. heh. i just hope some people from the studio are going in August. i've gotta find out. & maybe i'll find out when Ali is going..we used to be friends maybe if we go the same week we'll start talking more again? i dont know. i'm just so happy. i cant believe it. i feel..like i'm actually good at something.
i just got back from riding with my dad to the Hardees to see if the old cars were out tonight but they werent there. so we rode over to the Dariy Queen in Varina because they are there sometimes too but they werent..:( the lady working there said they should be coming out in a few weeks.
my dad is getting the new carpet and seat covers put in the Vett in like..two weeks. by this summer that car is gonna be so amazing. i wish i had an old car..i dont know which one i'd want because i just love them all..hmmm..oh i finished my West. Hem. project last night. wooooooooo.
i feel really weird. happy and sad. all rolled into one. i'm sappy. i'm had. which ever you prefer.
i take one one one cause you left me and
two two two for my family and
three three three for my heartache and
four four four for my headaches and
five five five for my lonely and
six six six for my sorrow and
seven seven for no tomorrow
♥