cabin waa waa
i go to work.
i work all day.
i get picked up and go home; there is no public transportation. there is no spontaneity for me me me.
it is 8 degrees outside.
i work on painting and shirts.
i send letters to friends who never write back.
i make dinner and love my partner who is as depressed as i am.
i obsess over his poor health habits and worry a lot.
i hate this house. how did he ever survive growing up here?! it's unbearable.
cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry.
god, i'm pathetic. how can i get out of this selfish sadness?
i'm driving myself crazy!
i'm too old for this behavior, i should know better.
i guess i have to learn to drive.
agh, i don't want to, though- that means i'll end up driving everywhere- it means giving in to the way the world works.
i just want to live on land. and make my own food and have little tincture bottles and wear cotton.