what they most commonly do during sex. "Bzzow," Nicole does a decent imitation of a light saber as she knocks her pink strap-on lightly against Ian's dick.
"Doesn't that get old?"
Nicole spreads Ian's legs, pushing until he takes the hint and holds them up himself so she has her hands free, one to grip the base of her sparkly cock and one to trace her fingers around his asshole where he's slick and open for her. "Not yet," she says, smiles when Ian shivers a little from the teasingly light touch of her fingers. "But I have some really good ideas about taking this to the next level with glow-in-the-dark condoms."
"I love you," Ian says. Nicole just giggles and drowns out his groan with another light saber noise as she pushes inside.
who has prettier hair. "I missed this," Nicole mumbles into the back of Ian's neck, muffled by his hair. He has no idea how she can be comfortable like that, especially since when she talks she must be getting hair in her mouth.
"Mm, yeah." Ian shifts back into her a little more; her arms tighten around him, but she shakes her head.
"Not the cuddles," she says. "Your hair."
"...thanks."
"Well, the cuddles too, obviously."
Mollified, Ian turns over to face her, because cuddles are great but now it's probably kissing time (the second-best of all the times).
"But if you cut your hair that short again," she says, between soft kisses, "I'll kill you."
what they argue about most often. "I dunno, Jar-Jar was kind of adorable."
"I'm hanging up now. I may never speak to you again."
who'd cope best if the other one died. I started to write this as a ficlet and depressed the fuck out of myself and also hated it so um Ian would and it would be after they were old and had an awesome life together.
the happiest plausible happily-ever-after I can think of for them. Nicole brings home a puppy the day she gets the news, which turns out to be a little bit of a mistake.
"I have news!" she says; Ian takes one look at the squirmy pile of fuzz in her arms and sinks into the nearest chair, looking stricken. "Um - "
"Just, I'm bracing myself, hold on."
"What?"
"If it's news you had to soften with a puppy, dude, I need a minute."
"It's a celebration puppy, dumbass, they're remaking Star Wars and my manager got me an audition for Leia."
"That's horrible!"
Nicole frowns. "What?"
"Um, not for you, awesome. They can't remake a classic! They'll butcher it."
"Okay. You stew for a while, I'm going to take her to the backyard and train her to go for the balls."
It only takes Ian a couple minutes to come after her; he wraps his arms around her from behind and kisses her neck and she's not even that mad at him but she won't complain if he wants to grovel.
"I guess it'll probably be nice to not have to mentally edit your face in when I jerk off to the gold bikini," he admits.
nicole had to learn early not to tell him anything about filming because he'd get all D: SACRILEGE D: at her
but he went with her to the premiere, and even had some high praise - "you were the only reason that wasn't an abomination," he says. "Since I can't set fire to only the parts you aren't in, I'll allow it to exist."
"I love you, too," she says, and makes a mental note to hide the gold bikini until he's less annoying.
oh god yeah they do, and it takes a little bit for them to get the hang of it but then it is their FAVORITE
she does until ian complains that he never gets to be darth maul >_< and then they buy another one and have dildo fights
and then they have trouble explaining to brendon why there are two double dildos on the bed because you know they are that couple who doesn't put their shit away
you'd think she'd know what a delicate flower Brendon was if he's over their house so often, though. maybe he's just asking because he wants to join in >:)
what they most commonly do during sex.
"Bzzow," Nicole does a decent imitation of a light saber as she knocks her pink strap-on lightly against Ian's dick.
"Doesn't that get old?"
Nicole spreads Ian's legs, pushing until he takes the hint and holds them up himself so she has her hands free, one to grip the base of her sparkly cock and one to trace her fingers around his asshole where he's slick and open for her. "Not yet," she says, smiles when Ian shivers a little from the teasingly light touch of her fingers. "But I have some really good ideas about taking this to the next level with glow-in-the-dark condoms."
"I love you," Ian says. Nicole just giggles and drowns out his groan with another light saber noise as she pushes inside.
who has prettier hair.
"I missed this," Nicole mumbles into the back of Ian's neck, muffled by his hair. He has no idea how she can be comfortable like that, especially since when she talks she must be getting hair in her mouth.
"Mm, yeah." Ian shifts back into her a little more; her arms tighten around him, but she shakes her head.
"Not the cuddles," she says. "Your hair."
"...thanks."
"Well, the cuddles too, obviously."
Mollified, Ian turns over to face her, because cuddles are great but now it's probably kissing time (the second-best of all the times).
"But if you cut your hair that short again," she says, between soft kisses, "I'll kill you."
what they argue about most often.
"I dunno, Jar-Jar was kind of adorable."
"I'm hanging up now. I may never speak to you again."
who'd cope best if the other one died.
I started to write this as a ficlet and depressed the fuck out of myself and also hated it so um Ian would and it would be after they were old and had an awesome life together.
the happiest plausible happily-ever-after I can think of for them.
Nicole brings home a puppy the day she gets the news, which turns out to be a little bit of a mistake.
"I have news!" she says; Ian takes one look at the squirmy pile of fuzz in her arms and sinks into the nearest chair, looking stricken. "Um - "
"Just, I'm bracing myself, hold on."
"What?"
"If it's news you had to soften with a puppy, dude, I need a minute."
"It's a celebration puppy, dumbass, they're remaking Star Wars and my manager got me an audition for Leia."
"That's horrible!"
Nicole frowns. "What?"
"Um, not for you, awesome. They can't remake a classic! They'll butcher it."
"Okay. You stew for a while, I'm going to take her to the backyard and train her to go for the balls."
It only takes Ian a couple minutes to come after her; he wraps his arms around her from behind and kisses her neck and she's not even that mad at him but she won't complain if he wants to grovel.
"I guess it'll probably be nice to not have to mentally edit your face in when I jerk off to the gold bikini," he admits.
"That's the spirit."
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(loling forever and ever over the last one, seriously.)
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but he went with her to the premiere, and even had some high praise - "you were the only reason that wasn't an abomination," he says. "Since I can't set fire to only the parts you aren't in, I'll allow it to exist."
"I love you, too," she says, and makes a mental note to hide the gold bikini until he's less annoying.
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They are TOO dorkily delightful, these guys <3
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so ian fucks her and is all meh the other way's better
and nicole's all proud of her dick but offended on behalf of her vagina
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(They eventually get around to trying a double ended dildo, right? How does that work out for them? Does Nicole like to pretend she's darth maul?)
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she does until ian complains that he never gets to be darth maul >_< and then they buy another one and have dildo fights
and then they have trouble explaining to brendon why there are two double dildos on the bed because you know they are that couple who doesn't put their shit away
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and then he pauses. and then he's all wait why do you need TWO DDD:
and nicole is all oh i fold them in half so i can put four dicks in ian at the same time
and brendon is all please stop talking
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you'd think she'd know what a delicate flower Brendon was if he's over their house so often, though. maybe he's just asking because he wants to join in >:)
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And nicole all dude, he winks every time he asks us about sex, I cracked his subtle code. But if he can't ask like a grownup, he can suffer
Meanwhile brendon's all I don't get it, spence, have I lost my mojo?
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