Reunited, But Did It Feel So Good?
Sometimes, it's better to leave the past behind you. And sometimes, it's better to take one look in to see what you don't really regret leaving behind.
I'd heard talk at work about high school reunions among some of my co-workers, twenty-five year reunions and such. I thought about how I'd heard through the grapevine that there was a five-year reunion of sorts in the works. Then, a week before Thanksgiving, I got a message via Facebook. There was a reunion Friday night after Thanksgiving at the Derryfield Country Club.
I debated not going. Truth be told, my relationship with my classmates was always strange. A lot of people knew of me, by name if nothing else. But they didn't know me. I was good for a friendly "hi" in the hall or at the mall, but not for a party invite or a gathering. It was the weird duality of being the person who's known popularly, but not really popular. Any reunion would be sure to be a gathering of the in-crowd. Why would I go? And why would I want to go to see people who are doing worlds better than I? I've felt so stagnant lately. I'd talked with a friend of mine how we'd be so out of place at any reunion, we'd be best to avoid it.
But on the other hand, I wanted to go. This was the chance to network with people I hadn't seen in forever who might still be around. I talked to an old acquaintance who said she was going to go, and plan to leave if it grew stale. And I gave that some thought. What did I have to lose by going? If I didn't know anyone there, if I didn't get along with anyone there, I'd bow out...other commitments, or that I was just stopping by anyway. I'd at least know what was going on. And if it was good, I'd stick around. Everything to gain, nothing to lose.
I'd figured I'd show up around start time, but then I found out an old friend, Anne Morin, was considering going, but her boyfriend wasn't going to be in town. Rather than both go alone, we decided to go together...at least that way, we'd know someone else there, to make things less awkward. I started to catch wind of who was going to be there.
And so Friday night, we went.
I went in with mixed expectations. And we both had a great night.
We arrived as some of the first people to filter in. Rémi Francoeur was already there, as were a few others, and Megan Colby arrived a bit later. Others filtered in, mostly from the Bedford in-crowd. We mingled, we shared stories, mostly talked about what we'd done, what we were doing now. The upshot? Anne and I feel less like losers for living at home still. Quite a few people are still living at home with parents, though they're mostly working through grad school and another job, or just finishing school. A couple people were on five- and six-year plans. Not everyone's cruising down Easy Street yet. That's for the ten-year reunion.
Some people had talked about bailing on the Derryfield in favor of the Shaskeen downtown, and around 10:30 we finally left, some of the last to take off. We found parking off Elm Street, and walked down to the Shaskeen, where a line stretched out along the door and Megan Colby found herself unable to get in. Rémi was down at the Black Brimmer, so we made our way there instead. Anne and I left shortly after we got in...the cigarette smoke didn't agree with us. We instead walked back to the car and met up with Anne's sister down at Jillian's. I'd always heard Jillian's was a smoky place, that cigar smoking was en vogue there, but it was far more tame than the Brimmer, where it seems like eighty percent of the crowd smokes. Anne's sister's friends were taking off when we got there, but we hung around for the live band for another half hour before heading home. It was late by then, but none of us were tired quite yet.
It was a nice night, though. Saw people I'd not talked to in some time. Saw people I'd never really met before. Learned that some things never change...the cliques stay the same, the subgroups stay the same, the class system stays the same. Some people talk to each other, and some haven't put things behind them. "You just don't get along with some people," someone said to me. Aren't we old enough to put the petty stuff behind us?
That said, it was still a good time, an educational experience. Anne enjoyed herself, I did, too...and we found some places to hang out when her boyfriend's back in town, and when some other friends of ours come up this way. So much learned in one evening.
Aside from that, it's been a dull week countered by a lot of work, some later evenings. It feels like work has been life this week...after-hours tech support for a client's machine, some side work off the "clock" for the real job. I've been giving thought to a second job, but I don't know if I want to really work for cheap after hours just to fill the time. Plus, my main job requires my flexibility. It's a lot of talk for now, but I have to do something.
I'm learning fast that doing what's gotten me here isn't enough to get to the next level. I guess I just need to figure out what else to do to get there.
I'd heard talk at work about high school reunions among some of my co-workers, twenty-five year reunions and such. I thought about how I'd heard through the grapevine that there was a five-year reunion of sorts in the works. Then, a week before Thanksgiving, I got a message via Facebook. There was a reunion Friday night after Thanksgiving at the Derryfield Country Club.
I debated not going. Truth be told, my relationship with my classmates was always strange. A lot of people knew of me, by name if nothing else. But they didn't know me. I was good for a friendly "hi" in the hall or at the mall, but not for a party invite or a gathering. It was the weird duality of being the person who's known popularly, but not really popular. Any reunion would be sure to be a gathering of the in-crowd. Why would I go? And why would I want to go to see people who are doing worlds better than I? I've felt so stagnant lately. I'd talked with a friend of mine how we'd be so out of place at any reunion, we'd be best to avoid it.
But on the other hand, I wanted to go. This was the chance to network with people I hadn't seen in forever who might still be around. I talked to an old acquaintance who said she was going to go, and plan to leave if it grew stale. And I gave that some thought. What did I have to lose by going? If I didn't know anyone there, if I didn't get along with anyone there, I'd bow out...other commitments, or that I was just stopping by anyway. I'd at least know what was going on. And if it was good, I'd stick around. Everything to gain, nothing to lose.
I'd figured I'd show up around start time, but then I found out an old friend, Anne Morin, was considering going, but her boyfriend wasn't going to be in town. Rather than both go alone, we decided to go together...at least that way, we'd know someone else there, to make things less awkward. I started to catch wind of who was going to be there.
And so Friday night, we went.
I went in with mixed expectations. And we both had a great night.
We arrived as some of the first people to filter in. Rémi Francoeur was already there, as were a few others, and Megan Colby arrived a bit later. Others filtered in, mostly from the Bedford in-crowd. We mingled, we shared stories, mostly talked about what we'd done, what we were doing now. The upshot? Anne and I feel less like losers for living at home still. Quite a few people are still living at home with parents, though they're mostly working through grad school and another job, or just finishing school. A couple people were on five- and six-year plans. Not everyone's cruising down Easy Street yet. That's for the ten-year reunion.
Some people had talked about bailing on the Derryfield in favor of the Shaskeen downtown, and around 10:30 we finally left, some of the last to take off. We found parking off Elm Street, and walked down to the Shaskeen, where a line stretched out along the door and Megan Colby found herself unable to get in. Rémi was down at the Black Brimmer, so we made our way there instead. Anne and I left shortly after we got in...the cigarette smoke didn't agree with us. We instead walked back to the car and met up with Anne's sister down at Jillian's. I'd always heard Jillian's was a smoky place, that cigar smoking was en vogue there, but it was far more tame than the Brimmer, where it seems like eighty percent of the crowd smokes. Anne's sister's friends were taking off when we got there, but we hung around for the live band for another half hour before heading home. It was late by then, but none of us were tired quite yet.
It was a nice night, though. Saw people I'd not talked to in some time. Saw people I'd never really met before. Learned that some things never change...the cliques stay the same, the subgroups stay the same, the class system stays the same. Some people talk to each other, and some haven't put things behind them. "You just don't get along with some people," someone said to me. Aren't we old enough to put the petty stuff behind us?
That said, it was still a good time, an educational experience. Anne enjoyed herself, I did, too...and we found some places to hang out when her boyfriend's back in town, and when some other friends of ours come up this way. So much learned in one evening.
Aside from that, it's been a dull week countered by a lot of work, some later evenings. It feels like work has been life this week...after-hours tech support for a client's machine, some side work off the "clock" for the real job. I've been giving thought to a second job, but I don't know if I want to really work for cheap after hours just to fill the time. Plus, my main job requires my flexibility. It's a lot of talk for now, but I have to do something.
I'm learning fast that doing what's gotten me here isn't enough to get to the next level. I guess I just need to figure out what else to do to get there.