Title: The Game of Life
Author: Erin (
erinm_4600)
Characters, Pairing: Frank, Stephen, Kim and the girls (mention of Eva, Natalie and Miles)
Rating: PG
Summary: Frank Powell has lost his mind. And he's taking Stephen Connor with him.
Warning: post-series. *Written for Round 19 of
prompt-in-a-box. Prompt #12: "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." (Albert Einstein)
Disclaimer: The original characters belongs to NBC and their respective actors. The Game of Life belongs to Hasbro.
It had started out innocent enough. The girls came home from a friend's birthday party with a borrowed game. Kim had told them they could play after dinner - one game - with Frank. Following spaghetti, salad and chocolate chip cookies, Frank allowed the girls to drag him into the computer room.
He assured all three of them that he was familiar with 'The Game of Life', having played it long before all three of them were born. They were skeptical when he told them about the version he played, without Life tiles and flashy new 'experiences'. As the girls argued over which face they wanted and which color car, Frank remembered having similar disagreements when he was younger.
Only the Monopoly fights ever got violent, though.
Once everyone had settled - Frank was currently a rotund, red-headed male in a yellow car - the game began. It took him a few tries to get the wheel to spin - he didn't shake the mouse hard enough or something - but he finally spun a seven. Having chosen the career path over education, his youngest gave him a disappointed frown, but soon forgot her displeasure when he became a rock star.
As each turn progressed - the girls all attended college - Frank read the spaces out and, occasionally, had to explain what something was. Specifically why Spring Break in Florida was something none of them would ever experience.
Frank, apparently, eloped and, before he'd realized it, was married and - with a lucky spin of 10 - a third of the way through the board and the owner of a log cabin. Tesha was the first to have a baby - twins - and her sisters soon followed, one winning something called 'Ultimate Idol' and one attending a Hollywood premiere in the process.
After nearly an hour, Frank had a big screen TV, had run for Congress, been sued twice and visited the Grand Canyon. He also had roughly $480,000, which reminded him that it was just a game. Due to some unlucky 'spins', the girls all passed him and he got stuck going back to school. Unfortunately, he lost the rock star-gig and was now a veterinarian, but the pay seemed to be better.
At some point - he missed it - Tesha lost her job of lawyer and was now a police officer. What this meant for Frank was simply that every time he spun a 10, Tesha got $10,000 for his 'speeding'. She currently had $985,000 to her blonde-in-a-purple-car-name.
Somehow, Frank was informed that he was now a grandparent, which confused him as he had no children. All three girls were world travelers, between trips to Egypt, the Alps and the Great Wall, while Frank only managed a theme park and the Old Soldiers' Home.
When Tesha asked what that meant, he told her that he'd only gone to visit Doctor Connor. Befre reaching the end of the game - all three girls had already 'retired' - Frank had two more grandchildren and a life-saving operation. Retiring fourth, Frank assumed he was done, but there was still more to the game, it seemed.
When all was said and done, Frank managed a decent second place, with $1,090,000 to his name.
Kim appeared to usher the girls off to bed and Frank headed for the kitchen for more cookies. When she reappeared, having tucked everyone in, Kim ordered Frank up to say goodnight to his daughters. Half an hour later, Frank was back in front of the computer, trying not to give the game a thought.
He lasted five minutes.
For the rematch, Frank let the computer play and, for a laugh, set one player as Kim, one as Connor and one as Tesha. Again, he headed for career first, while 'everyone else' went to school. 'Kim' married the same guy Frank had chosen for Connor, as had 'Tesha', and he had to laugh when 'Connor' chose lawyer as a career over doctor.
After two children, Frank lost his job and became a police officer - and called the game fixed every time he spun a 10 and didn't get a ticket - while 'Kim' and 'Connor' had three babies. At some point, 'Tesha' won a race, but 'Connor' got half the prize money. The same happened to 'Kim' when she had to pay for some art festival; half the fee went to 'Connor'. 'Tesha' tried to sue 'Connor', Frank adopted a dog and went on a cruise and 'Kim' found buried treasure.
Frank had to have plastic surgery and then landed on the life-saving operation space again; he commented to an empty room that it must have been the bathtub drain and then laughed when he became a grandparent four spaces before retiring. He won the round, while 'Connor' came in last.
"That's what you get for stealing my woman," Frank told the monitor. Kim came in behind him and glanced over his shoulder for a moment.
"You coming to bed?"
"Yeah," Frank replied off-handedly and returned his attention to the screen. "Just one more. It'll be quick, baby," he told her. Kim rolled her eyes, kissed the top of his head and headed upstairs while Frank set up a third round. This time, he set the computer to play his friends.
Halfway through the third round - when 'Eva' and 'Natalie' had both married 'Connor' and 'Miles' had married 'Eva' - Frank started taking notes. Twice, 'Connor' married 'Kim', but only once was he a doctor. Frank tried college once, but still ended up with a lost job and career. 'Eva' and 'Connor' had no children, but a mansion, so ended up winning, while Frank came in last.
It was nearly three when Frank finally made it to bed. When he got up the next morning, Frank waited for the girls to go to their friends' houses before starting the game up again. Stephen would be over at three for the football game, so Frank figured he had time for two rounds.
He was half-way through the third round when Kim directed Connor into the office. "I never thought I'd be so happy for a damn football game," she mumbled. "Can't get him away from that stupid thing," she told Stephen, waving toward Frank and the computer. Stephen smiled at the look on her face and Kim shook her head and left the room.
"Hey, Stephen," Frank mumbled, eyes glued to the screen. He did look away for a moment, as Stephen pulled a chair over and sat down next to him.
"What are you doing?" Stephen asked, raising an eyebrow as 'Miles' traded his mobile home in for a mansion. He noticed the names of his team across the bottom of the screen, and watched as 'Eva' took a turn. Frank took his turn, then 'Connor' and then 'Natalie'. "Hey!" Stephen groaned when 'Natalie' sued 'Connor'.
"You deserved it," Frank replied. Stephen raised an eyebrow. "You sued Miles."
"What does that have to do with anything?" Stephen asked as the screen announced 'Miles' had a grandchild.
"Of course," Frank continued, ignoring Stephen's question, "Eva did elope with him after she married you, so..." Frank gave Stephen a sympathetic look and turned back to the screen as his turn came up again. Stephen watched in confusion as 'Miles' sued 'Connor' and had another grandchild, 'Frank' became a grandparent and 'Eva' had a life-saving operation.
"Really, Frank, what is this?" Stephen asked, reaching for the notepad Frank had been taking notes on.
"It's the Game of Life, Stephen," Frank replied with a hint of sarcasm. Stephen read over the various events and laughed.
"Clearly, you need a real vacation," Stephen said as he tossed the notepad back to the desk.
"Don't mock it until you try it, man," Frank said as he leaned back. "It sucks you in." Stephen smiled and nodded as Frank leaned forward again and started a new game.
"Football?" Stephen asked with a frown as Frank waved at him.
"We've got time," he warned and set up the same order for the fourth time that day - Frank, Connor, Natalie, Miles and Eva - and started a new game. As he had every time before, Frank started with career and became a police officer from the start. Stephen didn't understand what was so funny when 'Miles' eloped, and then Frank pointed out that the woman he'd married was the same in the lower section as 'Eva'.
Stephen groaned when 'Natalie' became a lawyer and Frank laughed when she married him. Frank laughed when 'Connor' married 'Eva', while Stephen slapped him when 'Frank' gave 'Connor' a speeding ticket. To make things even more interesting, 'Eva' also married 'Frank' and 'Connor', 'Eva' and 'Natalie' all had children in the same turn.
"Quit giving me tickets!" Stephen demanded, slapping Frank's arm again as he gave 'Connor' two more tickets.
"I don't make the rules," Frank nearly shrieked as he ducked away. As the round continued, 'Frank' retired second, after 'Natalie', while 'Connor' retired fourth. 'Connor' ended up winning the game with $2,115,000. Frank only had $840,000.
"See," Stephen said, pointing to the screen, "mean to your friends gets you last place." He nodded to Kim, who had appeared behind him with a tall glass and flicked Frank in the back of the head.
"OW!" Frank cried as he jumped and reached back to massage the back of his head.
"Be nice," Kim warned, pointing at him menacingly. Stephen smirked and tried to hide it behind his drink.
"Oh," Frank laughed and leaned forward, "it's on, now." He set the game up again and as before, started with a career.
"An entertainer?" Stephen asked with a smirk.
"Yeah, I'm a rock star. You got a problem with that?" Frank asked, giving his best friend a dirty look. Stephen made a face and looked back to the screen. 'Miles' eloped with 'Natalie'; 'Natalie' married 'Connor'; 'Frank' married 'Kim'; 'Connor' married 'Kim'; and, by the time 'Eva' got married - she'd missed finals (and a turn) for the third round - 'Miles' had a girl, 'Frank' had twins and 'Natalie' had a girl.
"Kim!" Stephen yelled over his shoulder then looked through the doorway to where she was in the kitchen. "Eva married Frank! While he's married to you!"
"I married Kim first!" Frank defended, eyes still glued to the screen. "And you married Kim, too," he added as 'Natalie' adopted twins. "Hey, you and Nat have three kids now," he said, which caused Stephen to frown and turn back to the screen. Frank pushed back with a deep laugh a minute later. "And now you have a boy!"
'Connor', once again, took first in that round, with $2,125,000.
"Okay, I don't like this anymore," Stephen said, shoving Frank to one side. Frank threw up a hand and gave Stephen a look.
"Let me set it up, Stephen. You'll break something." Stephen made a face and pointed to the screen.
"Orange car." Frank snorted.
"It even looks like you damn El Camino," he teased. "There. Orange. Happy?" Stephen pointed again. "What?" Frank asked with a shrug.
"I want to play," Stephen said in boss-tone.
Half an hour later, Kim was certain both of them had gone insane. While most men their age were currently in front a TV, screaming at the referees, Frank Powell and Stephen Connor were screaming at a computer game.
"Damnit, Eva!" she heard Stephen shout. What she didn't know what that 'Eva' had lost her job of doctor and drew the police officer card. She had given out six tickets- Seven tickets. A moment later, Kim thought that the boys had moved into the living room when they cheered.
"What happened?" she yelled, certain she didn't want to know.
"Eva went back to school!" Frank and Stephen yelled together. "Now she's a lawyer!" Frank added a moment later.
"Miles learned CPR!" Stephen called out a minute later. She heard them laughing - almost hysterically - a moment later, but didn't know why. She also knew better than to ask. About five minutes later, Kim took two plates into the computer room, each holding sandwich, and saw a scoreboard, with Eva's name on top and Stephen's on the bottom.
On the last round - they had been threatened by Kim if they played any more - 'Natalie' and 'Eva' both married 'Connor'; 'Frank' had four kids and 'Connor' visited the Old Soldiers' Home. 'Connor' then had a life-saving operation and when 'Eva' visited the Old Soldiers' Home a bit later, Frank jabbed Stephen and told him that the first visit was dropping Stephen off, and the second was Eva stopping by to see if he'd died yet.
Frank and Stephen were discussing the details of the life-saving operation 'Connor' had, when Frank remembered his own earlier emergency following the plastic surgery. "Fishtank water," Stephen replied as Kim pushed his chair aside, gave Frank a shove and grabbed the mouse.
"Hey!" Frank said with a frown as Kim closed the window and reached over to eject the disc.
"You're in a time out, mister!" she told him with a stern face and pointed finger. Stephen smiled and looked away and was promptly smacked in the arm. "Now, go watch your damn football game!" she ordered, pointing toward the den. Returning to the kitchen, disc still in hand, they could hear her muttering something under her breath.
"You gonna tell Eva how many times she sued you?" Frank asked as they rose and moved into the other room.
"Yeah, right after I tell Miles that he married Eva six times." Frank leaned over the coffee table and picked up the TV remote. "Then," he continued, pointing the remote at Stephen, "I'm gonna tell Nat how many kids you had." Stephen made another face as he dropped to the couch and the two of them watched the end of the game.
As the post-game wrap-up ended, Kim came into the living room to take the bowl of chips and looked at Frank and Stephen. "Stephen, we're having hot dogs for dinner. Are you staying?" Kim's hands went to her hips as she waited for an answer.
"Yeah, man," Frank said, tapping Stephen's knee. "Stay for dinner." Stephen nodded and looked back to Kim.
"I guess I'm having hot dogs," he said with a smile. Kim returned to the kitchen and Frank leaned to the side to watch her go.
"You want a beer?" Stephen shook his head. "No, Stephen," Frank said quietly, "you want a beer." Frank’s eyes widened slightly and he nodded slowly. "Kim hides everything in the same place. Which means," he said, dropping his voice again, "I know where the damn disc is." Stephen tried to hide the smile and leaned back.
"I'd love another beer, Frank." Frank nodded and jumped up from the couch. Stephen leaned back and raised a hand to cover the grin spreading across his face.
The next day, Miles, Eva and Natalie were sitting in the library, wondering why Stephen and Frank weren't speaking to any of them.
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Oh, did I take notes through SEVEN rounds...