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Do you know how it feels to finally think that the most perfect thing in ur life is gonna happen and then BAM it isnt. Well thats how i feel rite now, this christmas was supppose too be amazing and wonderful and for once i had someone to spend it wit. Well rite now i have no one to spend it wit, im not having christmas at all, and my mo and dad are fightin over who has to deal wit me on christmas, lyk im a fuckin chore or something. Then on top of tha ti have a fucin 5 paper term paper due wednesday. I got fuckin 850 on PSAT.....my life is fuckin crumbling in my hand and i think im jsut gonna let it go. Do you no how it feels to have the one person u love say goodbye april. Well i fuckin do it sucks. I cant fuckin anytihng down, im gettin wicked sick. Im pushin soo hard to put this huge fuckin smile on my face to fool everyone cuz i dont want peoepl to see this hurt i have inside from my dad. And err i just cant take family shyt anymore.....i jsut wanna curl up in a ball and stay there for days. I dont wanna die or anything i jsut wanna curl up and hide. I mean yeah dieing would solve alot of shyt. But i would NEVER leave eryn here. Ever, even if shyt is rocky rite now and i dont even no wat to do. I would never leave her side. I dont no even wit things being as fucked up as they ae death is not even a option. I dont even no cuz i wanna hate everyone soo bad but i just cant cuz this whole yhing is my fault and i no it. I guess this is the point in time where i jsut realize that my whoel fuckin life is my fault and that im never gonna be this all amazing person who someone would want to call theirs, i mena maybe for awhile but i dotn think anyone will wanna be mine forever.
The crumbles in my hand, are slowing fallin to the floor. Once they fall i have no idea how to get them back.
The crumbles in my hand, are slowing fallin to the floor. Once they fall i have no idea how to get them back.