11 inaccessible things
On the eleventh day of Christmas...
eleven inaccessible things, ten acts of drama, nine sleeping dragons, eight phone calls of note, seven people watching, six building blocks, five unusual accounts, four mysterious keys, three insect encounters, two people learning and one night in a tent...
Fandom: Malory Towers
Rating: PG
Sally settled down and let out a breath she didn't realise she had been holding,
“Merry Christmas”. Comfortable silence descended and she closed her eyes, relishing it for just a moment before she spoke again,
“Things have been difficult again, sometimes it's hard to keep things together. Even after all this time”. Raindrops scattered on the backs of her hands and she shook them gently,
“Five years, it's hard to believe. Some mornings, even now I...I...forget”, she choked on the tears that were threatening the back of her throat, “I suppose it must be the five year anniversary that is making this so hard”, a wry and bitter chuckle, “And I know that you would tell me that it's just another day and that it's no harder than any other but...”. She trailed off and stared out over the grass with a sigh,
“Davey and Alexandra look a lot like you did when you were young...I don't know if that...whether it makes it easier or harder. I don't see them very often, Felicity doesn't come around much...”, the lump in her throat grew and tears ran from deep blue eyes. She shook her head again, leaning forward to pull up the hood on her coat as the rain came down harder,
“I hate that saying...everything happens for a reason. Well...I'm still trying to work out what the reason was. Why you have to go?”, the tears ran trails down both cheeks now but she made no move to brush them aside, just let them wash away with the rain drops, “Why did you have to leave me?.” She took a deep breath and swallowed heavily,
“I find myself hoping more and more that there's something after this life. That I...I get to see you again, and I know that there's probably not but sometimes I'm sure you're still here. Things will happen and I'm sure that you're still...out there somewhere. It sounds so silly to say it outloud...”, Sally's fingertips danced over the tips of the grass and she let out another sigh,
“I should go...before anyone comes looking for me...got a lot to do”, she got to her feet reluctantly, and bowed to touch her lips to the top of the gravestone, “I love you Darrell, Merry Christmas”.
Fandom: Primeval
Rating: PG
Summary: All Nick wants is Claudia Brown.
The whole damn mess keeps him up at night. Thoughts of Jenny Lewis and Claudia Brown. He had gotten a photo of Jenny from the personnel files at work and had sat, for hours at a time, staring between the two photos and they were identical in everyway...on the outside at least.
Nick pushed the photographs away from him, and pulled the tumbler of whiskey closer. He had loved her...Claudia Brown...and in some ways he wished that he could love Jenny too, because then it would almost be like...
He downed the last of the glass and poured himself another. It didn't matter what he wanted because no matter how much Jenny looked like her, she wasn't Claudia - and it was the differences that mattered in the end.
He didn't know whether his and Helen's actions in the past completely wiped Claudia from history, or whether he himself had emerged in another, parallel universe or...or a strand of his old universe or...
He dropped his head into his hands and squeezed his eyes shut, his mind running in an endless loop of what-ifs and regrets.
He just wanted her back.
Fandom: Resident Evil
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Sherry is sure it's more than a crush.
Most of all it was the visits from Claire that Sherry looked forward to. It was lonely here, subject to questioning and investigation and...and...experimentation over what the G-Virus did to her body. She had learnt very early on that it had left her with super-human healing abilities which - considering what they did to her sometimes - was for the best. It was for the sake of science, for the sake of the human race...that's what they kept telling her.
Claire raises hell if she thinks Sherry has been mistreated, so they've learnt to schedule the experiments for when Claire's not around, which had been happening more and more these past few months. Sherry knew it was because the virus was spreading, and the whole world was falling into chaos, but she just felt so alone.
Claire doesn't treat her like a freak of nature, doesn't recoil from contact with her, doesn't do anything to make Sherry feel different, and that's probably how it all started. The gentle rush of her heart on the morning of Claire's arrivals, the trembles that danced over her skin when Claire greeted her with a warm embrace, the dreams...
Of course she's gone and ruined it now. She cursed herself again and again as she replayed the moment over and over in her head. All she had to do was hug Claire back and move away, that was it; but instead she had brushed her lips against Claire's neck, felt the shiver in response from the older woman, and moved to capture Claire's lips with her own. Claire had responded for a few, blissful seconds before pulling back.
"You're too young", Claire had mumbled, "You're just...it's just a crush...I understand...I saved your life and you're misplacing all these feelings..". Sherry had wanted to grab Claire and tell her that it wasn't just some childish crush, that she was nearly an adult and she knew what she wanted, but instead she had let Claire go.
So now it's the visits from Claire, that she misses the most.
Fandom: Elementary
Rating: G
Summary: Moriarty considers the perpetrator of her downfall.
It is a very rare occasion in which I am wrong about people, and there are only two people on Earth who have ever surprised me. One is Sherlock, and that really is of no surprise - even someone like me can be wrong-footed by such a unique mind as Sherlock's. The other causes me more frustration.
His little project, Joan Watson.
I have been painting her, from memory of course after all Sherlock is willing to maintain contact via letters but he would hardly be accommodating to sending me a photograph of her. I stare at the painting and try to work out how she did it, how she surprised me. No, it's more than that. I'm trying to work out what Sherlock sees in her. Of course I don't believe for a minute there's any sort of intimate relationship there, that would be ludicrous; no, this is an intellectual relationship of sorts. I'll grant that Joan is above average in intelligence for the average person but it's not as if she is within Sherlock's league.
I have tried asking Sherlock, in my letters, but he avoids too much reference to her. The only thing he will say about their little union of minds is 'With Joan around, I am far better at what I do'.
As infuriating as it is to be in here, it is far worse knowing that it was Joan Watson that got me here.
Fandom: Cold Case
Rating: PG
Summary: Lilly is never really sure whether what she sees some days is real...
It isn't exactly something she would ever tell anyone, that would pretty much guarantee a lifetime subscription to the department therapist, but Lilly is sure that she sees the people she has helped.
Which would be fine, if the people she helped didn't have a tendency to be dead.
It's not as if she walks around talking to dead people, in fact she never communicates with them at all. It's when she closes a case, when she sees justice for a victim who was forgotten about five, ten, fifteen or more years ago; she gets this feeling and she'll look around and she'll see them, standing there as real as she is. They never do much, there was the occasional inclination of the head or ghosting of a smile, and then they're gone.
She's not sure whether what she's seeing is real, or if it's some manifestation of her overwhelmed mind, but she finds it strangely comforting so she's not looking for it to stop.
Fandom: Bully (Canis Canem Edit)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Gary tries to remind Pete of what he will never have.
"Whatcha doing Petey?", Gary's hand grabbed the back of his neck as he swung down into the chair next to him. Pete shrugged and squirmed in an attempt to dislodge his hand,
"Just...looking over some homework", Pete mumbled, trying to concentrate on the paper in front of him. Gary leant forward and chuckled emptily to himself. He pushed the chair back onto two legs and gave a low whistle,
"Oh Petey...this isn't your homework. So we know how you've been spending your free time". Pete squirmed in his chair and tried to focus on the correction he was going to make, but Gary was back closer again, whispering in his ear,
"You've been running around doing little favours for Jimmy haven't you?".
"No..."
"So why are you doing his homework?", Pete elbowed Gary out of his personal space,
"I'm not, I'm correcting it, leave me alone Gary, I'm not bothering you", and for a second he was almost proud of himself for standing up for himself, but when Gary dragged the whole chair around and got right up into his face, his bravery faded quickly.
"Think you're tough now you've got a little thug for a best bud? He protects you so you do his homework? Is that the deal? Huh?! Or is it something else Petey? Are you hoping that...eventually...Jimmy will be asking...other favours off of you?", and Gary's hand had started to climb the inside of Pete's thigh with those words. Pete stood up quickly, knocking Gary off balance and onto his ass. With one quick swipe, Pete had grabbed the work and was storming out the room.
"He's never going to want you like that, it's all in your head Petey!", Gary called after him, almost cackling with glee.
"Fuck you Gary", Pete muttered as he slammed the door behind him.
Fandom: Bully (Canis Canem Edit)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Because Jimmy was once a kid, dreaming of his place in the world
Jimmy liked to lie and watch the stars. Of course he was hardly going to tell anyone, he can just imagine the crap he'd have to put up with if anyone found out. So he didn't do it very often, but tonight the sky was clear and the stars sprung out at him, there was no way he couldn't stay and watch for a while.
He used to do it a lot, when he was little, when his mother was only on husband number two. He would sit out in the garden and star up at the stars, sometimes he would even try and get closer to them, to touch them, to catch one for his very own. Those plans stopped when his first step-father had dragged him down from the roof and taken his belt to him. Jimmy kept his feet on the ground after that.
Step-dad number two wasn't much better. Jimmy remembered asking him what was beyond the stars and whether, if he worked hard, he would grow up to find out for himself. After his fifth can, step-dad number two was far too impatient and far too drunk for the dreams of a boy, and Jimmy never asked again.
He gave up watching the stars for years after step-dad number three locked him out of the house, telling him that if he "loved those fuckin' stars that much he could sleep out with 'em". He damn near froze to death that night before his mother finally unlocked the door for him, and was serving breakfast the next morning with a black eye.
Still, every so often he lies down and gazes up, even sometime reaching out and making a light-hearted grab for one of the tiny balls of light. Every kid has got to dream.
Fandom: Final Fantasy VIII
Rating: G
Summary: Zell wonders if anyone else has this problem
Not being able to remember a decent chunk of his life didn't come up as a problem until he turned thirteen and enrolled in Balamb Garden's SeeD training. Then things like his place of birth and his date of birth mattered, and when he asked his parents they just told him they'd send on the information and got off the topic as quickly as possible.
Zell was the first to admit he wasn't a stop and think kind of guy - more a rush in fists flying and see where things go person - but this just didn't sit right with him. He tried to go back in his head, as far back as he could remember, but there was always this blank, this emptiness before the age of about five. He had always just assumed that you didn't remember stuff from that long ago but other kids at Balamb could recall these fleeting sort-of tid-bits about childhood. He just had this huge wall that appeared anytime he tried to push it further back.
Maybe he had suffered a head injury as a kid? Been kidnapped from his real family? Okay, it was more likely he was adopted than kidnapped but still, his parents would have told him, being adopted isn't such a big deal. So that meant it was something else.
No matter how hard he tried, all he ever got from thinking about it was a headache....
Fandom: Binary Domain
Rating: 15
Summary: They walk among us...
I saw the news, I know what's happening, everyone does and now the whole damn city is exploding with panic. I need to get home, I need to get in and lock the door and just think...I need to think.
There are too many people, it's like swimming upstream. Why are they all going the other way? Shit...shit...shit...I need to get home.
I stumble into the road amid a blaze of horn blasts and nearly get side-swiped by a taxi, but I have to keep going.
I take the stairs up to my apartment two at a time, racing past Mrs Dawson from the floor below in case she's one of them...
The next thing I know I'm flat on my back and my head is screaming with pain, I scramble back to my feet and run to my apartment, I don't care who hit me, they could be one of them...
With the door shut I can breathe again, and I stand there for a moment, slowing down my racing heart and letting my mind settle. I need a plan. Who knows how many of these Hollow Children are out there? I should pack in case I need to leave quickly. I need to check my head out first, it's killing me.
It's like someone is choking the life from me as I walk into the bathroom and see myself in the mirror. I blink desperately, hoping it will disappear but it doesn't, so I have no choice but to step closer. I lift a hand to my head and tug at the flap of skin hanging loose off my forehead, it pulls in my hand and I can see it. This can't be real, this isn't real. I pull harder, the skin tears off in my hands and there's blood now, how can there be fucking blood?! I grab another piece, near my temple and pull again, it comes off with a sickening rip and blood speckles the mirror. I just keep tearing, grabbing another piece of my face and pulling until it's there, it's fucking there! The metal...
No! I'm not one of them, I'm not. I'm human, I know I am, I remember all these things, I remember growing up, I remember...I remember...
They find me an hour later, my screams probably disturbed the neighbours...or maybe they're checking everyone. I know what they're going to do to me. I know they're only following orders.
But I'm human...
Fandom: Primeval
Rating: G
Summary: Sarah could just take a peek...
As she sat, waiting for them to come back and chewing happily on her slice of bread and jam, it finally, really occurred to Sarah that through that anomaly was the future. The future of mankind, and all she would have to do was step through and she could see for herself.
She contemplates it, of course, what scientist wouldn't? She can see why Danny was so eager to jump through, but for all her curiosity she waves this one off. And it's not just because this is a world from which giant mutated killer ants come from, although she will admit that plays a key part, it's because deep down she thinks that maybe she's just not quite ready to see what the world has in store for them just in case she can't deal with it.
Maybe one day, just not today.
Fandom: Malory Towers
Rating: PG
Summary: Alicia thought she saw something...
Normally she would have made some quip about Darrell's lack of concentration, but when the darker girl collided with her during Lacrosse and they ended up as a heap on the floor something wiped the words from her mind.
As Darrell blushed, mumbled an apology and lifted herself up off of Alicia, there was a definite darkening and a glint in those brown eyes. If it had been at a different time, in different circumstances, Alicia would have assumed Darrell was about to lose her temper.
As it was, she knew it meant something much different, and try as she might, Alicia couldn't get it out of her mind, long after the moment had gone.