all i have to say
is yea it does hurt
no i don't want to move on
from any of it
but i have to push forward somehow don't I
because if i don't it will crush me with every glance
every thought of it
i don't want any sympathy i don't want to be comforted
i just wish i could be told
that .... i really don't know what i wish to be told
i just wish there was something better
someone better
some happiness
everytime i lay my head down i just feel like crying
because of all the shit that has happened in the past 4 months
its ridiculious and i wish i could be there for more of my friends
i reallly feel as if i am neglecting them
which im not i hate being awake
until 5 am every freaking night
this is not my idea of fun
i wouldmuch rather be asleep and 9 pm in a happy situation
rather than dreding everything
i really hate to say it but i do
i dread work
hanging out even sometimes i dread doing that
im missing my grandfather even more so
i always ask "if only he where here"
what would be happening
i think overall that this house it just testing my limits of how far i can take it
how much i can take before i break
even im not sure anymore
most of this is just a ramble
but hopefully someone willread this anduunderstand a little bit more of how i feel inside all the time...
and im really sorry for whoever hadto suffer through all the typo's
there's alot i promise
no i don't want to move on
from any of it
but i have to push forward somehow don't I
because if i don't it will crush me with every glance
every thought of it
i don't want any sympathy i don't want to be comforted
i just wish i could be told
that .... i really don't know what i wish to be told
i just wish there was something better
someone better
some happiness
everytime i lay my head down i just feel like crying
because of all the shit that has happened in the past 4 months
its ridiculious and i wish i could be there for more of my friends
i reallly feel as if i am neglecting them
which im not i hate being awake
until 5 am every freaking night
this is not my idea of fun
i wouldmuch rather be asleep and 9 pm in a happy situation
rather than dreding everything
i really hate to say it but i do
i dread work
hanging out even sometimes i dread doing that
im missing my grandfather even more so
i always ask "if only he where here"
what would be happening
i think overall that this house it just testing my limits of how far i can take it
how much i can take before i break
even im not sure anymore
most of this is just a ramble
but hopefully someone willread this anduunderstand a little bit more of how i feel inside all the time...
and im really sorry for whoever hadto suffer through all the typo's
there's alot i promise