letter
Dear Mom & Dad,
The only reason why i'm writing is because I feel it's easier for me to get my true feelings to you. I want to start off with school. For the longest time, i wasn't trying. I slacked off. This has changed. Even tho you may not realize it at home, i am trying my absolute best in school. i even went in after school for extra help in something i didnt understand. is that a sign of not trying? would i have done that freshman year or even last year? nope. i didnt even think about it. and if i did, i found excxuses to not go in. and my grades show it. yes, i could study more at home, and i couild sit down with ashley for however long and help her more, but you have to look at it from my position. would you want to go to work for 7 1/2 hours doing the same thing all day, then come home and do the same thing, ten work with a child doing the same thing, then eat dinner, then do whatever till bed? probably not. thats unhealthy. dad, you're pretty much into ta season now. which means you work almost 20 hrs every day 7 days a week. i know you dont do it for your health, or for leisure... you do it to get by, pay bills, make sure we have nice things & food on the table, & make sure we go on our traditional trips. and i give you so much more credit then you even know. i honestly dont know ho you do it, and stay sane at the same time.
cheerleading. i quit for many reasons. do you realize, from the amount of money i did have saved up, i now only have $30 in an envelope in my room? i dont ask you for money because i know you dont have it. i refuse to take money from my friends because i know i wont be able to pay them back. i think you both know how depressed that alone can make one person feel. just because im a kid doesnt make a difference. im very independent. this stresses me out so deeply. i really didnt want to go competitive. thats for reasons you wouldnt understand. one of the biggest reason wa because i wanted more time to myself. theres more reasons but i'd rather not waste my time explaining them because i've already quit.
johnny. if you asked me if i missed cheerleading, in a heartbeat i'd say no. but joking with my friends, i'll say not yet. so no, i dont miss it, i miss my boyfriend. almost 2 weeks ago, it was a monday to be exact, johnny and i were taling on the phone, and he said to me, "if i cant see you during the week, then what's the point of being in a relationship?" those words cut me so deeply, and quickly reminded me this is my fault. its my fault for agreeing to something i should have seen in my heart wasnt going to work out. he didnt ask me to quit cheerleading, he told me to follow my heart. and selfishly, not looking deeper than i should at the consequences, i made a decision and followed my heart. and to be honest, i am happier now that im not on the team, but not seeing johnny is sufficating me. that kid is my world. seeing him helps relieve the stress that i am going thru. crying myself to sleep, laying next to his bottle of cologne is not. and this isnt just our faulth. (i say our fault because all i did was quit something i didnt like, i didnt kill anyone, and you guys are punishing me by killing my week social life.) its his family's fault as well. i cant see him during the week and he cant see me on the weekends. i feel like this is one big test to see how strong our relationship is... just look at how close we are and our will to see eachother is stronger than anything else. one point about him i want to make is, yesterday, you told me not to focus on him so much. dont you think if we spent more time together, it wouldnt cause relationship troubles, therefore, i wouldnt have to focus on him or when the next time i'd get to see him...
chores and working around the house. this we are on the same page. i agree, i could do more. and i should. it just really sucks when i dont get credit for what i do do. and this is disencouraging when it comes time to do other things. its basic psychology. when any human gets praised for doing something good, it makes them want to do it again and again. when you're constantly being told "this is done half-fast"/"this isnt your best" (sound familiar?) this isnt praise and this is very disencouraging. just think about trainning abby. people, children arent very different. im taking a class that proves this theory true.
please take this time to reconsider my punishment. if it wasnt that big of a deal, i wouldnt have taken so much time or put in as much thought as i did for this letter. i've already signed up for SADD. and i've promised you im doing soccer. i dont regret my decision, i regret accepting the consequences.
-amanda
The only reason why i'm writing is because I feel it's easier for me to get my true feelings to you. I want to start off with school. For the longest time, i wasn't trying. I slacked off. This has changed. Even tho you may not realize it at home, i am trying my absolute best in school. i even went in after school for extra help in something i didnt understand. is that a sign of not trying? would i have done that freshman year or even last year? nope. i didnt even think about it. and if i did, i found excxuses to not go in. and my grades show it. yes, i could study more at home, and i couild sit down with ashley for however long and help her more, but you have to look at it from my position. would you want to go to work for 7 1/2 hours doing the same thing all day, then come home and do the same thing, ten work with a child doing the same thing, then eat dinner, then do whatever till bed? probably not. thats unhealthy. dad, you're pretty much into ta season now. which means you work almost 20 hrs every day 7 days a week. i know you dont do it for your health, or for leisure... you do it to get by, pay bills, make sure we have nice things & food on the table, & make sure we go on our traditional trips. and i give you so much more credit then you even know. i honestly dont know ho you do it, and stay sane at the same time.
cheerleading. i quit for many reasons. do you realize, from the amount of money i did have saved up, i now only have $30 in an envelope in my room? i dont ask you for money because i know you dont have it. i refuse to take money from my friends because i know i wont be able to pay them back. i think you both know how depressed that alone can make one person feel. just because im a kid doesnt make a difference. im very independent. this stresses me out so deeply. i really didnt want to go competitive. thats for reasons you wouldnt understand. one of the biggest reason wa because i wanted more time to myself. theres more reasons but i'd rather not waste my time explaining them because i've already quit.
johnny. if you asked me if i missed cheerleading, in a heartbeat i'd say no. but joking with my friends, i'll say not yet. so no, i dont miss it, i miss my boyfriend. almost 2 weeks ago, it was a monday to be exact, johnny and i were taling on the phone, and he said to me, "if i cant see you during the week, then what's the point of being in a relationship?" those words cut me so deeply, and quickly reminded me this is my fault. its my fault for agreeing to something i should have seen in my heart wasnt going to work out. he didnt ask me to quit cheerleading, he told me to follow my heart. and selfishly, not looking deeper than i should at the consequences, i made a decision and followed my heart. and to be honest, i am happier now that im not on the team, but not seeing johnny is sufficating me. that kid is my world. seeing him helps relieve the stress that i am going thru. crying myself to sleep, laying next to his bottle of cologne is not. and this isnt just our faulth. (i say our fault because all i did was quit something i didnt like, i didnt kill anyone, and you guys are punishing me by killing my week social life.) its his family's fault as well. i cant see him during the week and he cant see me on the weekends. i feel like this is one big test to see how strong our relationship is... just look at how close we are and our will to see eachother is stronger than anything else. one point about him i want to make is, yesterday, you told me not to focus on him so much. dont you think if we spent more time together, it wouldnt cause relationship troubles, therefore, i wouldnt have to focus on him or when the next time i'd get to see him...
chores and working around the house. this we are on the same page. i agree, i could do more. and i should. it just really sucks when i dont get credit for what i do do. and this is disencouraging when it comes time to do other things. its basic psychology. when any human gets praised for doing something good, it makes them want to do it again and again. when you're constantly being told "this is done half-fast"/"this isnt your best" (sound familiar?) this isnt praise and this is very disencouraging. just think about trainning abby. people, children arent very different. im taking a class that proves this theory true.
please take this time to reconsider my punishment. if it wasnt that big of a deal, i wouldnt have taken so much time or put in as much thought as i did for this letter. i've already signed up for SADD. and i've promised you im doing soccer. i dont regret my decision, i regret accepting the consequences.
-amanda